Actually I miss here ,the friends here mostly are kind. And I am quite familiar with. Maybe my English writing skill went down, but still , It makes me feel good to start a dairy again.Since last time from now, my two foreign sisters are left. First, I had a crush on the kinder one, the Russian one, then we had a long-term arkward relation while she liked me but not loved me. And I almost have been to St.Petersburg with my Russian sis.but she stood me up. And we had a bad time after I told her I loved her as a lover, not a sis. and She freaked out like was hitting by a lighting. For sure she turned me down and made me like a fool .Then I was been to Taiwan with my parents, And it was pretty cool, since the people here are kind and polite, the people here mostly are well-educationed. And Taibei makes me feel very comfortable.After that I went back to school, I also set up an investigating group to investigate something about Online Literature. We went to Shanghai and I received lovely friendship from my groupmate. At the end, I am going to tell you a good news which is I have a girlfriend now, she is a lovely girl. Sometimes she can be a little dull, but she is kind in the heart and lovely in the most time(sometimes she will beat me though she thought she was kind as a lamb,so she say). I thought it was the only good new, and then suddenly, my Russian sis. came to me and said she had already fallen in love with me. What a joke！ Well, I mean I love my girlfriend. and our weak friendship was totally over.But tomorrow is another day ,isnt it ?

Actually we finished the 4 days- training and tomorrow is the final exam, I am excited. And to be honest ,I am more confident that the yesterday, I can manage it when cross the traffic light ,and the best part of training is getting scoldings，The teacher alway blame us and scold actually but his word is funny , and the point is the rest of us need to pretend to be solemly when he starting scolding ,anyway it is the last time he can get scolding ,things all like that ,First time you feel strange and want to escape and after that you accept it as your memory and then accept it as you life. All in all tomorrow is a big and important test~I need to pass it ,by the way ,my fiction will be better in this week.I am glad~

It was the first time that I drive on the real road, and The teacher told me to drive with some suggestions and orders.Getting scolding ~ a lot of scoldings.But seems I am the best in 4 person who are young students as me, So proud of myself. By the way ,16th August is coming ,and my liitle fellows will come back from their countries. That will be a happy time!! And as my friend said ,I will share with you about the drive lisence but seems this holiday I couldn't finish the forth test ,even I pass the 3rd one~what a tragedy. While as for my time in BBS ,I also met a lot of people ,who are kind ,who are mean. who are ridiculous and who are dull ,and that's life~ hope everyone has fun in forum~ Hope guys could read my fiction~~even it seems ridiculous, but the book is just begining ~~ http://www.cmread.com/u/bookDetail?bid=396805074

First thing is the car driving test , there are four then I passed the first the theory one in the last summer holiday and recent day I passed the second one ,also it was the most difficult one, because in Hangzhou ,the space is limited so the test is more difficult than the same test in North of China. and I got scoldings every day , of course there are 4 persons include me in one car, learning drive, just drive the car in a special place, with yellow line on the road ,if the car touch the line then you will die~~of course it is bittersweet ,because we use accent(xiaoshao accent, xiaoshan was a city next to Hangzhou but now it is a block belong to Hangzhou ) and my teacher is my grandpa's brother. so it is my grand-uncle.and I learnt driving car with the car god and my aunt who is 8 month older than me . the process was ridiculous and full of fun. but when the teachers came , then we all be a liitle kitty. And after the 2nd test I will carry on , joining the 3rd one, it is still hard and I have a practice. And by the way my fiction online.hope this time editor does not delete it ~~ http://www.cmread.com/u/bookDetail?bid=396805074

When my friends saw my wallpaper of my phone,they were confused why I took a pretty girl picture as my paperwall. Then I told them it was my girl once. And she said she would wait for me until I going back 'by colorful cloud'(like the monkey king seems stupid.) But before I left Hangzhou ,she said she need to make a choice between her boy friend and me. that is absurd~~isn't it ? no, it isn't, I was 18 and she was 20 and I was in High School and when she finished hers. but we just met in the Youth Author Association. She was glorious and cool but I was not bad (I can say that ). When I talk about it with my Sisters, they always feel confused. she has a boy friend around 28 year old, why should I ? I just replied that ,I save that for memory ,actually I lied, they know,but they seems do not know the real reason, I hope one day I can come back with' gorgeous flowers and white horse'.That is the imagination only ridiculous students who major arts can dream about. Well ,actually there is a saying, girls who major in science like boys who major in science,and girls who major in arts do as well. so left man who major in arts make gay couples. well. it is a dull joke but seems like a curse. And it can be a reason, girls leave you. if you just a dreamer ,then no one will believe what you boast. But the thing is when I tell her I love her after I finish my high school. I do not know she still have a boy friend, I know she is not a common women having the tradition mind. and I was almost 18 ,and she was 20, that summer holiday our association go to the Zhou Shan city and which is Dongji island lying in. And now I saw all the scene in the (Never ever meet again) I was touched, every scenes in the Dongji island were momery of mine ,I can see the two liitle island ,we stood for waiting the sunshine and the sculpture we passed for go to see the sea. and the house in the island and the ship. then every thing is like a dream show up again and again . I said it was fate to let me met my girl and loved her, but my sisters told me that every one like a pazzle we never know which couple is perfect before we trying to put two individual together ~ well well ,she is not my first-love literaly but I falled in love with she before.

Then there is a long time before I publish a blog again. I am so sorry to visit you online ,my friends ,still most of your names are too hard to remember. I can just say colinspeakman, because first time I saw the name I thought the was a speakman of one city called colin. no offence. and I try to mention Maierwei, and the lovely Chinese girl who talk to me online in English(seems a little wired.)and of course , the lady form great France _ teamkrejados it is really hard for me to remember that, many times I just work and work, but you are my friends here in the blog area. Maybe one day you can go to the BBS area. I am so glad to see you. But this blog is written when I back home I mean after taking a 4 hour' trip on then high speed train.then I leave Shangdong and back to Hangzhou. actually it's really hot here. I need to open the air-condition. Well but that is not the point. The blog I want to talk about my sisters, one of them is my classmate and one of them is her roomate. I just can tell one of they is from Finland and one of them is from Russia. I am not gonna to tell you that they are very nice and we become very good friends. even the things are like that .well you can still tell me that I like dominant women..well. Maierwei, this time just pass me. Actually .Anni . who from Finland is cool ,and she is a girl like cool things and well sometimes is emotional, but Nastya who also called Ana. has a cute face who seems like a Child. but many times she can be tough.That is the family I got in North.But I won't tell you what the real relation we are.maybe you can guess. in Chinese way ,NOT in the ridiculous western way. Wow.Ana is Childish and always like painting and singing .so in fact she and I have many things in common. like some music.and some movies and still some classic music I like sucks in her view. and actually many times she and I like the Children when Anni need to be the judge of us. Ana is as young as me ,and Anni a liitle older ,because most of my classmates are older than me. but Anni is a freshman in housework and Ana is a good one, so whne come to the dinner or the washing stuff , Anni will be a Child. Anni is like a spoiled girl many times and there are so many Chinese or foreigners want to talk to her or flirt with her.when I go out with her. she is like a modern woman and sometimes really hot. but still many times I am try to protect her and make things awkward. Not less one time I told her ,do not smoke and do not trust Chinese in a bar or a club ,and be careful about that. well ,seems I am cross the line. But I still do not want to anything bad happend on her. because she is my sister and she is in my country. and I will take the duty.but well ,I do not have time to go out with Ana ,because she is always busy ,we always go to KtV and I love to hear she sing the VITAS.That is awesome and she has a good voice. That is very cool. Well ,I love my sisters (really sometimes they make fun of my and I fight back , we are family that is cool )but nowaday ,Ana need to look after her little brother in Russia ,and Anni has the urgent thing in Finland ,so we just apart this summer holiday which make all of us, said. after that ,Ana paint a china pig for my to remind her, and Anni gave me a pine cone. ridiculous .I told her. she thought pine cone is not the south stuff what a lovely sister. but anyway I am touched ,not the gifts but my sister.well ,I do not take them as my foreigners friends to show off. that is ridiculous and disrepectful ,and that are not the aliens or monkeys. but my sisters ,but Anni still make friends randomly makes me worried since Iron Lady Maierwei suffered a lot in Hangzhou ,I am so worried. But I hope they can be safe and sound and I'd like to see them next semester.

for <The shadow thief> No matter how popular or how classic it is , at the end I will try to read it to prove it is or not, and so does this time . Honestly it is not so perfect when at the beginning of my reading ,I have no clue the problem is the dull translation or the boring original tone of author, anyway that can be the masterpiece. And I also find that this work was a little noisy and pretention which make me have no fancy to it . I could only say the idea is wonderful and someone who can steal other’s shadow and exchange his with each , hear the secrets from the other. Like a soul talker. But if it is a soul talker ,then the plot will be so common and ordinary . but I still can find something meaningful. The childhood ,friendship ,first-love and dream , those are not special but make life not weary .that is all it is . what we pursue in our whole live , apparently not money, reputation or honor ,we no more cheer ourselves happy and make people around us happy ,that is what we really want to do .and so all these can be the perpetual topic in novel . And so does this novel , the little chap lost his father and suffer in the school and his mother gave him warmth and his fellow gave him courage ,his little lover gave him love. That is a moving story , a girl seems deaf and dumb but actually she is just autistic , and two little children shared with the love in the beach and gave promise to each other.(the girl who can use the kite to express love will be the best girl to the boy ,and so does Claire) And finally with the time lapsing , the beach ,tower ,ocean are far away ,and friends ,lover also ,we finally should face the adulthood, no matter there is no dream at all . A man in a miserable situation and kill his time, maybe life was not aloof to him, he got a pretty lover ,a not bad job as a probation doctor and met his friends again . I do not know those all his friends or just the shadow of memory , just one moment, I thought he was living in the past or just get related to the past. And happily there is a good ending and lovely enough to make men touched. But still shadow , I just think all the things is in that boy’s dream and one day the dream is broken and he is awake like Do Ra Am(Japanese famous canton) The girl had grown up and so had the boy. And I know the reality is they would not get back anymore even they got together , some memory are just left for us to remember not relive.

Since I was very young like Grade 3rd or older, I have been told that how the world looks like outside of China. Like foreigners (precisely), how they have a gap year ,how they earn their money when they are very young and how they have the happy childhood. That makes me hold that idea that China is a closed country and I need to be the represent to interpret our glorious culture and splendid Classic , I know they are different but I do not have a clue why we are different ,the concept maybe is the zombie in our mind since nobody tell me whether the appearance do work or the culture. And since the notion of the country was established ,we know we are different precisely . We are not wrong ,I notice that when I mention my priceless medicine (hot water)to my friend , it seems to kill them ,they said they had tried it before but it make them choke . so I just give in .still ,I have no clue about the water heated can be so dangerous to them ,I do not believe it ,but they act it seriously and make me doubt my mind. I always change, keep wondering what the things we hold are different , maybe I draw a horrid conclusion , we have few things in common, we just different individual grow up in the different place, and the parents give you appearance and you make up yourself. We know quite a few facts ,like Africa is not a country, OPEC, Russia and Soviet ,cold war and so on ,we are not blind and deaf anymore, but we can not get trust until they try to trust you ,you can say the same words about some events but you just doubt that and that make people thought you are ignorance in that way. We deserve it and I will not regret . We also alienate with each other ,and just they are foreigner so we take these for granted, they will be aloof to us , but if they are your own kind, can you bet on they won’t be aloof .sometime we just deceive ourselves, and finally we find solitude is the most valuable cure to loneness. The weather in Jinan like a child face ,and we got a heavy hail with sudden rain , which polish the impatience and aggressiveness from my heart , and the idea comes to me ,when I linger on the balcony, the rain and hail still are not so chilly but I can feel the peace when see the water go through the air and make light sound which is familiar to me . It is also a strange city for me ,and I am here ,north of China, far from Hangzhou and I do not feel any uncomfortable when I settled in this city. I even do not familiar their hilarious accent (which is the mandarin based on )but I just accept , since I see the people I have the mind that they will know my pronunciation and maybe sometimes they didn’t and we know that we do not have to rethink too much before we take actions (talk or quarrel )because we have same country and the government on our side , all of us ,we are equal . I am so glad when I have friends here ,maybe more than friend , they are the family I got in Jinan , when I went to the Central campus for performing while my instruments lost on the taxi, they drive the electric bicycle against the crazy wind to take me home around the road. I do not mean I want some evidence to show they are important for me. But you will know how moved when you on the back seat and a sis. take you to her home and say you will be the bro. and they will take care of you in the unfamiliar city. Well I clearly know they will leave and I also will leave and we are not sure we can see or keep in touch again after four years or more ,but I still take that as my treasure of whole life. We go trough the life and get the story it has beginning and it also will have ending , I am not expect it to come but anyway there will be one day we will see good bye. However we have the happy and dark time together , that matters .

In the GAME OF TROME when I reviewed that episode.and the Grey WORM who is the leader of Unsullied which are the strongest slave amry in the charge of mother of dragon. and he had been crastated by the master when he was a child ,and I know he can't favor girl anymore actually since there are no or little male hermone in his body . Those are fictions and series , aren't they ? but if there is real possibility when couple love with each other without sex. that will be boring but in my view. that maybe the true and pure love , but just maybe ,because ,I just have the feeling sometimes with my EX .

In Jinan and tonight there is raining dogs and cats . while I feel peaceful in my heart because I had been reading LAO SHE(the well-know Chinese author)I read a lot of his books like the LUO TUO XIANG ZI , he is famous with the play named TEAHOUSE and I did not like him actually, because I do not like pretentious individuals, of course everyone do not as well . So that why I didn’t like him before, and his essays are in the Chinese textbooks. That is the reason I feel more uncomfortable about him .but actually I remember his article named the autumn of JI NAN and even I am in Shang dong University which most of its campus are in JI NAN I am still stubborn enough not to pay attention to him. And now I just chose his book as the necessary work for students who major in Chinese language and literature . so I began to read a book of his named The Happy Loneness , a collection of his some essays. Then I read a interesting man who enjoyed his life in JI NAN, who travel the Mountains of Thousand Buddha(now one of our campus )and the Spring of BAO TU (also one of our campus )and the Lake of Great Ming. I do not meant that the author were showing these attractions are so wonderful or splendid even they are ,just say that he was enjoying little happiness in his life. And before some days I had impulse to stay abroad for a while , I still have that impulse ,and I am writing a long fiction and have contract with one seems reliable association and I can get some cash from that . About that impulse, I even had talked with Maierwei and I do not want to waste my parents money and maybe I can stay in Russia which is close to China. and many men asked me ,why you went abroad ,for study or for work ,I said I just have a lot of reasons. I thought China is not very awful country, but Chinese style is still not a compliment for foreigners ,and I can feel that others still have some prejudice on China and maybe China is still low. And furthermore I want to see the world more wisely ,I can’t have right to say what I do not know .even I have friends and I know a lot of western styles ,I still think the reality is different ,and by the way It is a beautiful way to stay a strange country and enjoy your peaceful life ,at least I dream of it and I will try my best to achieve it .