It was raining outside on the second day of Chinese Lunar January, but it didn’t stop us to visit our dear grandpa who lives about 10 kilometers away. My father, brother, sister and I drove two motorcycles there. It was not very cold fortunately. My grandpa lives alone in an old adobe house where he and grandma raised six children. The house is simple and crude, with floor and walls unpainted. The furniture inside the house is old-fashioned, except a big second-hand TCL brand TV which was provided by my aunt (my mom’s sister). There are two big photos of him and grandma hanging on one wall together. On the other wall, there are full of posters with the image of soldiers and a calendar printed in the lower part. Grandpa went to war when he was young. He is provided with a new poster and some veteran benefits every year end. As I looked around, I found that everything almost remained the same as 20 years ago when I was a kid. I guess grandpa misses the old times when grandma was still there and deeply loves the place where he and grandma spent most of their lives. He folds the quilt in a special triangle just like grandma did before. He insists live in the old place alone instead of living with my uncles in their new houses. He wished that we could go to grandma’s tomb to pay a New Year call, which we didn’t do on that day because grandma’s tomb is on a hill and the road was full of mud due to the raining. My father and brother went there three days later and he was very happy. Grandpa treated us with a lot of delicious food, some of which he is not able to eat due to his decayed teeth. From the way he looked at us and the smile on his face when we were enjoying the food, I know that he especially prepared them for us. Grandpa spent a week in Changsha before the Spring Festival. My elder cousin, a very filial grandson, invited him to his new home in Changsha. He took grandpa to many places, such as the Orange Isle(橘子洲头), Yuelu Mountain(岳麓山), the Window of the World(长沙世界之窗) etc. Grandpa also boarded on the subway to experience the new way of transportation in Changsha. “Haha…Tao(My elder cousin) is so worried that I would fall that he grabbed my arm very tightly!” Grandpa laughed when he told us his experience. When he knew that we haven’t been to those places and that it was Tao’s first time to visit those places after living in Changsha for almost five years, he shook his head, “You all are busy making money and forget to enjoy life!” We replied together, “Grandpa, you are so right!” Then we burst into laughter. Grandpa will soon step into his 80s, but he is still hale and healthy. Mom always said, in our family grandpa is the only old people who have seen and enjoyed the new and modern life. His six children will throw him a big birthday party. All our distant and close relatives will gather together to celebrate his birthday. He is quite expecting it I know. It was a valuable experience to visit and chat with grandpa. He is very cute in my eyes. It is true that an old is a treasure to the family. I wish grandpa a happy birthday and a long and healthy life.

My boss had a chat with us yesterday. He said the reason why she sent her daughter to New Zealand is that he doesn’t want her to live in such a complicate country/society like China, that he wants her to be a simple person and be happy and do whatever she likes. I always thought my boss must be very happy with lots of money/property and a perfect family. But from our chat it seems that he is not. He said he was very tired. So are Chinese tired? I think the answer is positive. When you still a kid, you are required to take lots of after-school courses such as learning English, playing musical instruments, drawing etc while you are supposed to play outside with other kids. According to my boss, her daughter cannot find even one friend to play with after she came back from New Zealand this winter because all her friends/former classmates are so busy preparing for secondary school entrance exam that they cannot spare even half a day. After secondary school entrance exam, it is followed by Gaokao for which Chinese students have to study from early morning to midnight with almost no break. I’ve been there too. I think that was really a tough time. If everything goes well, you get to go to college. However, after spending relatively relaxing four years in college, we have to face the hard labor situation where a bunch of people compete for one job. When you finally get a job and manage to support yourself, it’s time to consider getting married which was constantly reminded and urged by your families especially parents. If you get married, you will inevitably need to buy an apartment or a house because most Chinese women don’t accept naked marriage. According to a research, the cost of marriage in Shanghai is RMB 2.0082million. But in view of the current house price, most Shanghai people say, with RMB 2 million you cannot even afford an 80 square meter apartment in urban area. Once you become a parent, you will have to work hard for your child to provide the best for him/her. When he/she becomes an adult, you will worry about his/her jobs and marriage. You will have to help them pay down payment for an apartment. I think that’s what most Chinese parents are doing for their children. Take one of my colleagues for example, his parents just paid more than one million yuan as a down payment for his new apartment. They said they will also take the responsibility of paying the monthly install payment for him and they are now in charge of taking care of his new born baby too. This is most Chinese people’s life, though there are lots of exceptions. It’s relatively very tired to live such a life though we can get some fun from it. So as a Chinese, do you feel tired sometime? And bloggers from other countries, what is your life like?

I got on the No. 20 bus in the morning. The bus was as crowded as usual. There were people getting in at each stop but no one getting off. It’s not surprising to see this at rush hours. I managed to find a place to stand, hoping there won't be any traffic jam this morning. When the bus pulled over at the third stop, an old lady who was shabbily dressed got on from the rear door and shouldered her way to the courtesy seat where a young man was sitting. The young man was very considerate and offered the seat to her. She said thank you and sat down. Suddenly a loud voice came, “The passengers get on from the rear door, please drop your coins!” Yes, that’s from the driver. The old lady realized that he was talking about her and then said something in Shanghai dialect (I guess she was apologizing for not paying bus fare for some reason) and added “thank you” in the end (I can understand “thank you” in SH dialect). The driver said nothing after hearing it. A week later, I saw this old lady boarding on this bus again. Neither did she drop her coins nor did she swipe a public transportation card. Once again the driver reminded her. She looked embarrassed and said “thank you” and then went directly to the rear end of the bus. The driver shouted angrily, “’Thank you’ is not going to work. Next time you have to pay!” Today, as usual, the bus pulled over at the third stop. The driver's voice attracted our attention, “Do not get in if you don’t drop your coins!” Oh, the same old lady! She was trying to get in. However, hearing what the driver said, she stepped back obediently. Then the driver closed the door and drove away remorselessly, leaving her in the cold. I don’t know what to say. I kind of feel sorry for her. However, what she did is not right. Though she is old and we all should care for the elderly, she shouldn’t use this to avoid her duty. Maybe she has her reason but ...

My younger sister came to my place two weeks ago right after she left the army. She was intended to find a part-time job here in Shanghai and then go back home with me for Spring Festival. However it’s not easy to find one which lasts only two months and near the place where I live. So she ended up being a waitress in a fast food restaurant. She had to work 9 hours each day serving dishes and cleaning tables and floor and she kept doing that for 6 days until she caught a serious cold. So she asked her manager for a one-day leave but the manager turned her down because Monday happened to be Winter Solstice when people eat dumplings (The restaurant’s main dish is dumpling). The manager also threatened that if she didn’t show up on Monday, she wouldn’t get her payment for all the previous work she had done. She was very anxious because of this but she finally decided to quit because (a) she found that she was the only waitress who showed up everyday do almost all the work besides an old lady who is the manager’s relative and does almost nothing, and (b) the manager won’t sign a contract with her until the end of the month according to the manager’s words so she cannot guarantee her rights especially when the manager should threaten her that day. The next day when she felt a little better, she went to looking for part-time jobs again. She had four interviews. Only a telemarketing company said yes and told her to work the next day. However, the next morning they told her that there was no extra office desk for her to use and asked her to wait for their reply within two weeks. That was an excuse maybe but we don’t know the real reason. When I came home after work, she told me that she wanted to go home immediately. I knew she was tired and the unpleasant job search experience really tortured her though she reassured me that it doesn’t matter and she would take it as a lesson and would be strong as always. I felt very sorry because I did nothing for her. I was busy at work every day and didn’t even spare time showing her around. I knew she was very excited about her trip to Shanghai and had all the fantasy about it. I need to do something to cheer her up. So I asked her to stay here for a few days to go some sight-seeing. I recommended a few places for her to visit and made a travel plan for her. On Christmas eve, I hung out with her and we had a fun talk. Friday night, which was the last night she was in SH, I took her to the bund and enjoyed the night view around Huangpu River. I was really happy that she liked the views of Shanghai. I saw her off at the train station Saturday afternoon. The minute she went into the waiting hall and waved goodbye to me, I couldn’t help shed tears. I really missed the days when she was around. She is very sweet and considerate. She would clean the apartment, do laundry and prepare dinner for me when I had no time. She let me get rid of the loneliness and feel the warmth of home. I hope she could enjoy the time with my families and have full life in college next year.

I made a plan for this National Day holiday almost two month ago that I would to go to Xiamen with my friends to breathe its clean air, enjoy its beautiful scenery and experience the life of petty bourgeoisie. Having worked in Shanghai for over two years, the places I went to were all located in Shanghai, Jiangsu and Zhejiang Province. It’s time to visit some place which is a little further from here. Xiamen is a good choice although there will be full of people, but which place won’t be overcrowded during such a long holiday in China? I convinced myself when this problem occurred to me. So I searched the city Xiamen on the Internet and read a lot of travel tips and made my own travel strategy. I was so excited that I even had a dream about it. Then my friend made the hotel reservation and booked the tickets online. Everything seems perfect! As the holiday drawing near, my colleagues are all talking about their plans. Some will go to Yunnan, some will visit Jiuzhai Valley in Sichuan province, some will fly to Japan or some other countries. At this moment, my boss came and asked me whether I will go home. I smiled and said, “No, I want to go to Xiamen.” “Why not go home?” He asked further and looked serious. Suddenly I was speechless. I realized since 2008, I only went home twice a year. I had almost one month to stay with my parents every time when I was still in college, but less than one week when I started work. God knows how many days left for me to accompany my parents. I felt ashamed. I was being too busy enjoying myself and forgot my parents, sisters and brother. I need to go home! So I started to search the tickets quickly. Oh no! The train tickets were fully booked. Fortunately, when my boss knew about it, he granted me three more days leave, which means I can go home on 27th of September and most importantly there are still tickets available on that day. I was so grateful that I expressed my gratitude to my boss. Now I am very happy that I made this decision. It’s never too crowded in my hometown. I can still breathe the fresh and clean air, enjoy the natural beauty of countryside, experience its tranquility… And at the same time, I can be there for my parents. What a perfect plan! So what’s your plan for this national day holiday? Will you go home?

It’s been ten years since grandma passed away but she is always in my heart as if she never left me. That was a cloudy day. I came back from school and found many neighbours gathering in our house. Then I saw mum. When the word that your grandma passed away came out from her month, I suddenly burst into tears like the whole world was falling apart. It’s grandma who took care of me when I was little because Dad was busy making money to support the family and mum always stayed in my maternal grandma’s home. In cold winter, grandma would warm my clothes with her body temperature before puting them on me. In hot summer, she would shake her palm-leaf fan to drive away mosquitoes and bring coolness to me. She never wasted a grain of rice. She would go to field picking up ears of rice left by farmers. She would go to forest collecting fire woods to cook me a tasty meal. Her clothes and socks were full of patches but never looked ugly. She got up early in the morning almost everyday. By the time I woke up, the house had been cleaned and breakfast was ready. She ran a vegetable garden, surrounding which there were lush rose of Sharon and holly, and in which there were all kinds of well-grown vegetables. Soil scarifying, seeding, fertilizing and watering were all done by her. In summer, I had cucumber, tomatoes and melon as fruit. In winter, I enjoyed radish, spinach, cabbage…I miss all these natural food. When I was in preschool, my final exam grade was not as high as other peers and I felt ashamed. It’s grandma who told me not to be and encouraged me to work hard. And I didn’t let her down since then. My peers used to made fun of me for I was not as good looking as them. It’s grandma who kept telling me that I am beautiful and beauty is not always about appearance we also need to have a beautiful heart. My cousin Hong was my best playmate when I was little. One afternoon, when we were playing at the back yard, I said something which offended her. She became silent and didn’t talk to me since then. I was so stubborn that I was unwilling to apologize though I knew I was wrong and I felt lonely without playing with her. It’s Grandma who came to me and said gently with a gracious smile, “Honey, go talk to Hong. I know you two are best friends. Sometimes we need to have the courage to admit that we are wrong.” She was right. Everything can go back to normal or even better with just a simple sorry, all you need is courage. Grandma was an ordinary traditional Chinese woman, but to me she was a great teacher. She let me know these words—thrift, hard working, kind, confident, honest and brave-which serves as a useful guide in my life. Grandma was gone but I know she is in a better place. I miss her dearly.

On the way home I passed by a stall, which displays all kinds of beautiful hairpins. Attacted by them, I picked two for myself. "How much are they?" I asked the vendor. "20 yuan", he replied. In my subconscious, it's silly not to bargain when buying stuff in a stall. "Well," I said, "Could you give me a discount?" "Uh...OK...OK, 19, can't be cheaper any more." He agreed as if he had suffered great loss. It seemed to me that I had finished the routine bargaining process and resolved with this. "Ah, 20 yuan, deal, I just hope the hairpins' quality won't disappoint me." I handed 20 yuan to him as soon as I finished my words and in a haste of leaving. When I was about to take my hairpins to go, he took them away saying he would have them packed. "Oh, no, no need to pack them, save your bags", I said quickly. Then I saw a one yuan note together with the packed hairpins on his hand. I took the hairpins from him, gave back the one yuan note and said, " No, you take it please!" However no matter what I said, he insisted to give the one yuan note to me. I looked at him and smiled. I knew that the one yuan note was not just a discount he gave me, it was also a gift. I eliminated the interest conflict and brings kindness. I guess to make the world more harmonious we just need to be a warm person ourselves. (A story told by my friend.)

About one month ago, one of my senior high school classmates rang me and told me that she was considering to quit her job as a teacher in the high school attached to Hunan Normal University. I was so shocked because being a teache in such a school is many people's dream in my hometown. This is an "iron bowl" with high salary and long holidays. Then she explained that she have felt a lot of pressure teaching students, especially when most of students' parents constanly send her presents or invite her to dinner and she found it's hard to treat every student fairly. What's more, what she's been lecturing is aiming at exams thus very boring. She asked me what my life is like. I suggest her think twice before she quit because life in big cities is not easy either. You are on your own most of the time without families being around. You need to cook for yourself after work because you cannot always eat outside. You need to cram into crowded bus or metro for one hour or two everyday. Of course there are advantages working or living in big cities. You get to know a lot of excellent people from who you can learn a lot. You have acess to many new and modern stuff. You can participate some of the big events or activities, etc. To sum up, every coin has two side. She agreed and said she would think about it. Recently I have found this friend of mine is sharing her pictures in school on Wechat and QQ Zone and she looks happy. Today I happened to read an article "爱你现在的时光（Love Your Present)" written by Bai Yansong(白岩松). He said, "What's gone is gone so don't obsessed with the past; the future hasn't come yet so don't be anxious", "There is a mysterious logic of life, that is, if you live life to the fullest each day, you will embrace a good tomorrow." I think it's true. What we should do is cherish what we have now and love our present life.

It’s been two years since our graduation and 32 months since Chris and I were together. While most campus lovers choose to end their relationship when graduating, we decided to maintain it. “There are already too many goodbyes and don’t give up on the relationship we just started.” That’s what we thought when graduation approaching. Chris and I are from the same province and we happened to go to the same university in Xi’an. We got to know each other on a townsmen party (老乡会). We were just friends back then and didn’t see each other often until one day in the senior year we ran into each other during a job interview, spent some time catching up and had a good impression on each other. After that he kept contacting me and finally asked me to be his girlfriend on my birthday. People always say that it is a shame not to fall in love when you are in college. Anyway, this guy is nice. Why not give it a shot. So I said yes. It really feels good to always have some accompanying you. We had meals together, went to the library together etc. And we recruited by the same company but different branches. He needed to go to Shanghai R&D Centre and I was supposed to go Shenzhen International Trade Department. After the internship, I decided to go to Shanghai with him after graduation, which means I had to find a job again. When I told my parents about our relationship and my new plan, they were shocked and strongly against it. Part of the reason was that they were afraid that I would marry him and leave them soon.. I am their elder daughter and they raised me up and sent me to college by saving every coin and working non-stop and our family was still poor. I knew they needed me at the moment and I would certainly never leave them alone. It turned out that I made the right decision. Chris was very thoughtful and hard-working and responsible. It was tough at first to strive in such a big city without any relatives or friends but we went through it. Chris and I together helped my parents finishing building a new big house in my hometown in early 2013, which was my parents’ early dream. Now we just need to fight together for our own dream. Campus love can live long.

I went back to my hometown on May Day holiday for my cousin and my best girlfriend's wedding. I am their matchmaker of course. Early in the morning of May 2, my cousin's family prepared the wedding car. At 9am, my cousin, his buddies and I began heading to the bride's home with another 11 cars to pick up the bride and her families. We arrived at around 9:25am because it's not a long distance to drive. The minute we got off the cars, we set off the fireworks and firecrackers. The gate of the bride's house was closed tightly by her relatives. My cousin was supposed to give them red packets to open it. The next hurdle was to open the bride's bed room door. The bride's friends are in the room too. They prepared some tasks for my cousin. Only when he finished all the tasks would her door be open. The first task was to sing some songs for the bride. My cousin sang them nicely. The second task was to tell the dates of some things they did together like the first time they kissed etc. That's easy too. The door opened with little trouble. The bride was sitting on the centre of her bed in white. My cousin gave her flowers and was required to say 'I love you' to the bride in 10 different languages or dialects. His special accents of speaking different languages made all of us laugh loudly. Then he needed to make a marrige vow. It looked like every task was finished. My cousin was about to ask the bride to go with him but the bride's wedding shoes was missing. Actually it was hidden by her friends and my cousin had to look for it. It's really hard to search without any hints. So it's time to bribe her friends and families with red packets. After handing out many big red packets, the wedding shoes were finally found. My cousin put on the white wedding shoes for the bride and they kissed each other and were ready to go to my cousin's home. When we almost arrived at my cousin's home, the cars stopped. It turned out that my cousin's parents on hilarious make-up were greeting and waiting to pick up the bride with wheel barrow wrapped in red paper. My cousin was holding the red string ahead, the bride sitting on the barrow, my cousin's father pushing the barrow with people whipping him. After that there was the wedding banquet. The new couple thanked all the guests by toasting to them.Relatives and friends sent their best wishes by toasting back. May 2 was a sunny day. Wish my cousin and my friend happy forever.