Escape from the Matrix
2014-03-31
I want to continue the series of blogs on my, as a foreigner's, experience in China, but before I move on, I thought it would be meaningful and interesting first to focus more on my path of learning Chinese language, I mean Standard Mandarin, or 普通话 pu tong hua, or just 汉语 han yu. Because learning a language was one of the main important factors why I came here in the first place and that was a driving influential force that shaped the whole experience in China.
I know that both Plato and Confucius were fond of Ancient Past. Not like now in modern times, where we think that we are somehow superior and more advanced than people who lived 2000 years ago, they believed that there was something essentially good in the past, something that can be learned and admired. At some point I got "infected" with a similar admiration for the ancient times, and I got a personal proof that knowledge and wisdom accumulated by ancient thinkers and doers was still very valuable and practical today, and that if properly understood it could be easily related to a present day life and cherished. It was inevitable that having such an attitude, sooner or later, I would realize, not without a help of my mentors, that it would be important for me to study one of those "old" languages coming from an "old" country. I could choose Sanskrit, Ancient Greek, Japanese or Arabian, but very soon I found out that somehow my strongest affinity was with China and Ancient Chinese.
In Lithuania we didn't have too many original Chinese works of literature and philosophy translated into Lithuanian, but we had plenty of translations from Chinese into Russian. Russians did a very good job on that, and I think that they are among the leading ones in the field of Sinology, although not being properly exposed to English speaking world, they are not given this credit on a global level. However, in spite of that accessibility to Chinese heritage in Russian language, not talking about the fact that they have really good translations, it soon becomes clear that any translation is still first of all an interpretation and depends on the level of understanding of a translator. If one wants to study the original text he has to learn the original language. Also I liked the idea that knowing an original Ancient language may bring us closer to our roots, the roots of humanity I mean, the roots of our humane wisdom as well.
My motivation for learning Ancient Chinese (I didn't know initially that in China it was called 文言文 wen yan wen or just 古文 gu wen) was indeed very strong and charged with enthusiasm. If it was possible I would have learned first the Ancient Chinese, and probably even skipped the Modern Chinese. But as soon as I came to Nanjing University, I was told that until I master modern Chinese I can't really learn anything else. And that even for Chinese themselves it takes at least 8 years to reach an initial mastery of Ancient Chinese. Well, it didn't discourage me too much, and soon I realized that motivation to learn and master Ancient Chinese was a good one for rapid learning of modern Chinese, and eventually I started to enjoy both the "old" and the "modern" language. I also learned to enjoy the process of learning a language itself. Learning Chinese was difficult, challenging, but at the same time never boring, most of the time enjoying and rewarding. Besides, it had a very good "side effect" - additional job skill - enabling me to work several years later as an English-Lithuanian-Chinese translator and interpreter. Before the Chinese language studies I never even thought of that utilitarian secondary aim.
What I always found amusing is that to have a first break-through in learning of Russian language it took me 6 years of studies in school. And it took 10 years of studying English before I could really carry normal conversations. Certainly, I didn't have a proper native speaker environment for those two (Lithuanian is the primary official language in Lithuania), neither as a schoolboy I was motivated properly, but still in terms of letters, structure, sounds and even grammar these two languages are so much closer to Lithuanian than Chinese. Logically speaking it should be easier to learn them, but in my case it wasn't. Surprisingly, it took me only two months of studying in China, to have a first break-through in Chinese, where I could speak a little and understand, and after 5 months I already could, more or less, carry normal daily conversations. I know it may sound like bragging, and maybe to some extent I am bragging, but I realized that it was not something about me, it was about the China itself, about the way studies are arranged, and about the fact that almost any Chinese in the street can be your temporary language teacher, and they are quite willing to do that. Meanwhile, if you were in United States, you would be supposed to speak English by default, and if you don't - then it is your problem.
I tried a lot of different ways and approaches of studying Chinese. But first of all I was in the state of mind that says: "I want to speak this language NOW", I don't want to study for years or months. I want to communicate NOW! I want to learn other subjects in Chinese. I really desperately wanted that, and I was conscious of the fact that I have only 5 valuable months in China, which I wanted to use as best as I could.
My greatest discovery in this language learning process was after two months of studying. It was also kind of a secret. Not only because I didn't want to share it, but because there was no way how to share it. If I tried to tell it, most of "normal" people would probably not believe into that. I found that it does not matter how many words you learned, how much time you spent doing your homework (although it is important), as long as you somehow do not attune yourself to China in general and to Mandarin in particular you will not be able to comprehend what a Chinese guy says. I found that if one manages to focus in a certain way inside of himself, he can suddenly start to understand language, and not just keep doing Chinese-English or Chinese-Lithuanian mechanical translation in his mind. I found that in a class where some people studied Chinese only half a year, some a year, some a year and a half, what matters most is their general attitude, intensity of motivation, emotional mood and that inner focus or attunement. Sometimes that focus or attunement comes suddenly as if out of nowhere like an inspiration that can never be forced, but visits those who consistently put their efforts. That is why it is important not to take personal credit for this discovery, but thank something higher, what Confucius may call 天 tian. I believe anyone experiences these break-throughs and insights as long as they do sincere attempts to learn Chinese.
Certainly some other factors also are very important. For example, I had a few foreign student friends, actually, only two of them, who offered from the beginning to try using Chinese only and forget English. They also were more advanced in language than me. I soon realized I had to avoid English speaking friends, but instead try to hang out with Chinese. However unfriendly it may seem, it did make a huge difference. I also started to call the whole International Students Dormitory a "Matrix" in honor of famous "Matrix" movie with Keanu Reeves. I realized that as long as I stay in the Matrix I will not do much progress in neither understanding better Chinese culture nor learning Chinese language. International Students Dormitory creates a foreign space inside of China. It seems you are in China, but you are not. And indeed I confirmed this to myself, at some point later, when I managed to escape the Matrix and start living with Chinese and among Chinese. The first day I woke up outside of the dormitory, I could take a relieved deep breath, thinking in my mind: "I finally came to China".
I still want to study Ancient Greek, it is an amazing language as well. But neither Ancient Greek nor Ancient Chinese learning would not be that motivating if there were no beautiful and wise texts written with these languages.
I heard it used to be hard to leave dormitories in Beijing, Nanjing was not that restricted. Don't know if that is true about Beijing.
Thank you for your feedback!
Very ambitious reason to start learning Chinese! I wanted to study Latin and Ancient Greek as a teenager, but then felt linguistics would be too narrow an area for me. Learnt other languages for less ambitious reasons though :)
And it's true, dormitories or places where foreigners hang out indeed create an alternative dimension which many foreigners get stuck in. Good luck in improving!
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