I took the interview for teacher’s certificate several days ago. Before that interview, I had experienced time of anxiety. Many times as I told myself that there was nothing to worry about, considering that I have more than 3 years teaching experience, I still found myself sometimes in an anxious state.

According to the rules, I am eligible to take the interview in the city where I was born. I can also take the interview in the city where I work, as long as I have paid my social insurance for at least 1 year. (I have paid for more than 3 years in fact.) That’s something I knew after I took the exam, I had not found it before I submitted my first online application with the location being the city where I have worked for 3 years, which resulted in the failure of the first online application. In fact, I have not figured out till now why it was refused as I was eligible and as one of my friends had hers passed even though the interview location was not her birthplace either.) Anyway, I had to apply for the second time and changed the location to my birthplace. But the process was not easy. I was so afraid of having my second application refuted that I first phoned the Teaching certificate center to inquire about the reason why my first application failed, only to be intimidated by the lady who answered my phone call and offered vague and impatient explanation. Then I made lots of phone calls, asking my grandpa and my mother to go to the local police station to make sure that my famiy registered address had never changed. What’s more, I even called another teaching certificate center many times for further confirmation, but no one had ever picked my calls. I might seem overreacted but given that there were only 2 days left and the censoring duration online was, according to my first application, nearly 2 days, I might not have the chance to apply for the third time, and if I missed this interview, I would have to wait a whole year for the next, my reaction then seemed reasonable. My friend, who I mentioned before, became anxious too. Her online application was passed, but she did not know what kinds of materials she needed to get the permission of taking the interview. What if at that day she arrived at the location, only to find she was not allowed to enter. Her nerves were too on edge, and kept phoning different places to ask what kinds of material she needed. She got that fear partly because the lady, who answered my phone as well as hers using the same strict and impatient tone, said that without those materials like your contract, and your social insurance record, you wouldn’t be allowed to take the interview, even though your online application was approved of and you paid your test fee. In fact, the whole examination process later was proved to be less strict and complicated.

All of us don’t like uncertainties. When facing uncertainties in life, people have different reactions. Optimists are more likely to get through and are less likely to get panicked by telling themselves life is full of uncertainties, and there is no use to worry about what will happen in the future. However, people, whether optimists or pessimists, may feel even more anxious when things are out of control than when faced with uncertainties. For example, if we get well prepared for a test, we will feel more confident when it is a written test with multiple choice questions than an interview. Because for multiple choice test, all the answers are standadised and the test itself is objective. But for the interview, we do not have a standard answer and there is something out of control, especially the subjectivity of the interviewer which may to large extent, influence the result of our test. Besides, we all know that the more important the test is to us, the more anxious we may become. Actually, things later are all proven to be less severe than we thought.

Having read many psychological books and got more knowledge about human’s thoughts, emotions and behaviors, I am now actually less anxious when facing uncertainties and things I cannot control than I used to be. Getting rid of some emotions like anxiety is not impossible. The only thing you have to do is to change your perception towards it, considering it as something normal, accepting it and embracing it. The fact may seem simple to understand but difficult to implement. I am now still working on it. Hopefully, it will help me to better deal with my anxieties and to become a calmer person.