If death can be handled all problems, I think everybody would like to choose this method for some sudden moments. Many friends thought that I was the one who never have this idea. To me, while before people, I think that is correct, life is so short, why should I waste my time and help the God to shorten it by myself? It is a very very stupid action, right? However, behind people, I am not the positive person, actually, a little tired of the world, a little hatred about myself. I can smile while facing people, but you never know, I never smile while alone. Luckily, I always stay with people and keep high-spirit to face the society.

While seeing the news about the graduated committing suicide in the school, I told my colleagues that I finally understood why the parents can put up with the NEET Group (the children without education, employment, training) because they still have children to stay around. If the children can't have the positive ideas before graduation and only a wrong moment, they choose to say goodbye to this world. The parents should stay alone after 50s. It is very sad. Therefore, no-job is not a big deal while comparing with a dead body.

As known, if we don't have the despair moment, we can't understand their feelings. I know these feelings because I have the same experience. I smile to everybody all the time and persuade people to look for the good sides while I learn their stories. That is to say, I'm the sunshine for my friends and I never say anything negetive to my friends. But I didn't have any directions while graduating from the university, just lost. All the world around me, is just black. It is a net around my head, don't know how to escape. This feeling is a devil, can't be said to anybody. The worst moment was to commit suicide and then everything would be handled after my death. The world can't stand me because I'm a failure. This thought is very despair, very very darkest. I can't breeth at that time. If there is another chance, I would like to be another myself, not like now. How to finish my life will be an easy way to accept? I stay in bed for 2 days to think the methods. Time is long at that moment, I thought if there is any answer for the suicide, there must be some methods to escape from the lost. Why I should help the God finish my short life?

While in despair, I like to listen to the song "The rising sun" sung by Li Keqin again and again until I can feel the positive energy coming back. Living and death is a thought in sudden moment, keep positive.