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为什么每个女人都应该独自旅行一次? [Copy link] 中文

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Post time 2013-4-22 20:31:29 |Display all floors
There was a moment, the last time I traveledalone, when I was stuck in a dark alley in Mexico, with two wild dogs and alazy pony roaming around that I thought, "hmmm... maybe this wasn't thebest idea I've ever had."

But, that moment of uncertainty passed. Maybe it wasn't the best idea I've ever had, but, until Michael Fassbender comes along and whisks me away to Paris, it was the best vacation I've ever been on.

While I think everyone (gals and gents alike) should travel alone, I'm banging this drum hardest for my fellow ladies. Women often have a harder time escaping the pressures and expectations forced on them by well-meaning friends and family and creating physical distance between yourself and people's expectations can have lasting, positive effects.

There are plenty of reasons to travel alone, but embarking on some Eat,Pray,Love adventure to find yourself or some hokey, new-agey, mumbo jumbo like that, is not one of them. In fact, I think you'll be pretty disappointed if that's what your expectations are. Sure, you may discover a few things about yourself when you're vacationing alone, but the "real you" won't suddenly emerge after a weekend in Cabo.So, put aside your visions of Julia Roberts rocking a sarong and think a little more practical.Travel alone, because "I couldn't get anyone to go with me" is a terrible excuse for not doing something.

When I checked into my hotel in Mexico, the woman behind the desk asked if I was with my boyfriend. No, I said, it's just me. She shook her head with pity as she swiped my credit card, "Even no girlfriends come with you, Miss?"She didn't really understand that I was there alone, at least in this particular case, by choice. This was my surf vacation. I wanted to learn how to surf, no one else I knew did, so I came alone.Do not postpone what's important to you simply because others don't share your priorities.With other people, come expectations and compromises.

Travel alone so you can, for a short time, live without compromise.Don't want to get out of bed? Don't! It's your vacation. Want to spend the whole day shopping? Go for it! Want to wander from museum to museum without a break? Knock yourself out! For these few days, you can be exactly who you want to be and do what you want to do.We compromise a hundred little ways every day, so give yourself the chance to live untethered.Most importantly, travel alone and you will discover that you are a total bad ass.

And I mean this in the most sincere way possible; nothing is as empowering as doing something totally on your own. For me, Mexico started as a vacation but ended up becoming a bit of a personal triumph. Just the simple act of trying something new, something scary will make your inner bad ass shine. Trust me.Of course, there's being adventurous and then there's just being plain stupid. When you do travel alone as a women, there are some key things you should keep in mind:Have a Plan A, Plan B (And a Plan C, Plan D etc.)

You get my point. Don't expect to just wing it wherever you decide to travel. Do your research to minimize surprises. Run through some possible worst case scenarios and make sure you are prepared to handle the unexpected.In Mexico, I ditched the original hotel I had booked because I just didn't feel safe there. I found a spot closer to the beach that was more expensive, but had secure locks and way better views.(Plan D was sleeping in my rental car and then driving back to the airport at the first sight of daylight, but thankfully it didn't come to that.)Get wherever you're going before nightfall90% of the problems I had on my solo adventure could have been avoided if I'd arrived with some daylight hours to burn.

I found myself white-knuckling it through the Mexican desert on a dirt road as the sun was setting, and it was not a good idea.Plan to arrive at your chosen destination before nightfall and you won't have to wonder if your family will one day have to find your body in the desert half-eaten by coyotes.Never get trashed when you're traveling alone.

One night, my surf instructor, who was baked 90% of the time he wasn't in the water, invited me to a beach bonfire. Despite trusting him with my life in the water, hanging around in the dark on an isolated strip of beach with a bunch of dudes didn't feel like a good idea. I declined this particular invitation and spent the night in bed reading the one magazine I brought and feel asleep by 10. Lame? Maybe. Safe? Absolutely.You will get a little bit lonelyKeep this thought some place safe, some place easily accessible, because you'll need it when you're eating alone at a bar while rowdy groups of sweaty tourists are all around you: alone doesn't mean lonely. It just means alone. It just means that for now, you're on your own, and that's not a terrible thing.

If you get lonely, strike up a conversation with your fellow travelers, or approach someone who looks least likely to rape you at a bar. You don't need to be in self-imposed isolation for the duration of your vacation. Meeting new people, without anyone else's expectations lingering around you, is incredibly liberating and you'll be amazed at the experiences it opens up.

The real reward of all this adventuring will come after you get home. You'll have a sense of confidence and self-reliance that you can draw on in your every-day life. Remember that part about being a bad-ass? It stays with you for long, long after you get back.

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Post time 2013-4-22 20:31:58 |Display all floors
那一刻,应该是我独自旅行的最后一段旅程,当时我深陷于墨西哥一条黑暗的小巷,看着一边溜达着的两条野狗和一匹矮种马时,我想,“嗯。。。或许这不算一个好主意。”
尽管,当遇到那无法预测的处境时。或许我会觉得那不是一个好主意,不过,直到MichalFassbender出现并带我离开,让我回到了巴黎之后,对我来说那是一次最棒的旅行。

每当我认为每个人(包括女士和男士们)都应该去体验一下独自旅行时,就会去试图动员身边的女性朋友。女性经常很难有时间让自己摆脱压力,并总是把希望强加于她们的挚友和家人身上,而其实通过建立物理上的距离,可以保持并有效加强自己和周围人之间的关系。

有很多独自旅行的理由,如果只是为在吃,期许,在冒险中找寻自己或为了追求虚幻,新式,精神上刺激的话,那就有些不太现实。实际上,我想你将会相当失望,如果你是那么希望的话。我保证,你会发现一些事,在你独自旅行的时候,但是,当你一个星期后到了某个角落,那个“真实的你”不会突然出现。

独自旅行,因为“我找不到同行者”不用说一个糟糕的借口。

当我在墨西哥进入我订的酒店,接待台后站着的女士询问我是否和我的男朋友一起。我说,“不是,只是我一个人。”她一边怜悯的摇着头,一边帮我刷了信用卡,“也没有女性朋友和你一起,小姐?”

她不会真正理解我是独自去那旅行,至少在这种特殊的情况下做出这样的选择。这次是我的冲浪旅行。我想学着如何冲浪,我周围的人都不会,所以我独自来了。

不要轻易的搁置你最重要的需求因为别人不会同样优先考虑你。

和他人一起,随之而来的就是期望和妥协。

独自旅行,你可以的,只需一小段时间,不为妥协而活。

是不想离开家里的床?不要这样!这是你的假期。你想花整整一天购物?那就去吧!你想毫不停歇的从一个博物馆漫步到另一个博物馆?那就把自己拽出去!用这几天时间,让自己确切的知道你需要什么,你想做什么。

我们每天需要无数次的妥协,所以给你自己一个机会去解下身上的枷锁。

最重要的是,当你独自旅行,你将会发现你就是一个十足的蠢蛋。

我可以毫无保留的说,没有任何事都能完全在你的掌控之中。就我而言,墨西哥作为我旅程的开始,但最终是作为我个人的胜利。只要试图尝试一些其他的简单的行为,胆怯只会使你变的愚蠢至极。相信我。

做了计划A,计划B(计划C,计划D等等。)

你能明白我的意思。不要期待你只是去已决定去的地方。通过做你的研究去减小惊喜。跟着最坏的剧本跑,你将准备面对的是毫无期待的旅程。

在墨西哥,我入住了自己预订的当地的一家酒店,因为觉得那里不是很安全。而找了海岸附近的另外一家,那家价格更贵,但是有保险锁,并且房间视野不错。

(计划D是睡在我租的汽车里然后到天亮时再开回机场,但幸运的是我不需要这么做。)

在黄昏前去你想去的地方。
如果我在白昼消失殆尽之际回到酒店,我的独自冒险中90%的问题就能避免。在日落之时,我看着自己的白色汽车行驶在墨西哥沙漠中带着尘土的公路上,这确实不是一个好主意。如果按计划在黄昏前到达自己选的目的地,那你将不得不想是否你的家人有一天会在沙漠中找到已被野狼啃食了一半的自己的尸体。

当你独自旅行时不要丢失自我。
有一天晚上,我的冲浪导师,在培训中的90%的时间中,他都没下水而始终置身于烈日之下,他邀请我参加海滩篝火活动。尽管我相信他,但是在一个被隔离的海岸和一群人下水,并漂浮在黑暗中,我感觉这不是很好。我拒绝了这一特殊邀请,而打算在晚上躺床上看我买的杂志,直到10点困了为止。很逊?或许,安全?那肯定。

你会感到一点寂寞。
在安全上保持警惕,一些场合很容易与人接近,因为需要而当你独自在一家酒吧用餐时,有一群很吵,带着汗臭的旅行者在你周围时,独自并不意味寂寞。只是单纯的表现为一个人。那意味着现在,你只是你自己,那并不是太坏的事。
如果你觉得寂寞,你就和周围的旅行者展开交流,或者接近酒吧中感觉侵略性较弱的人。你不需要在你的旅途中将自己隔离开来。看看新的人群,那些不会长期逗留在你周边的人们,那是一种难以置信的解放,同时你会吃惊于这种开放的体验。
旅行中所有这些冒险的回报将会在回到家的那刻得到。你会在生活的每一天中表现的更自信以及自立。记住自己那愚蠢的一面?它会伴随你很久,很久,直到你回来。


来源:龙腾网

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Post time 2013-4-24 17:28:50 |Display all floors
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