Author: holidays

Let's talk about international and interracial marriage [Copy link] 中文

Rank: 6Rank: 6

Post time 2006-6-1 07:05:18 |Display all floors

Now I have an other question.

How about a western woman married to a Chinese man in US or other western country. The Chinese man thinks that China is more a place to him, which is a very common view for the oversea professionals these days. Will the western wife follow him to live in China? My friends are actually in this situation, and she is only willing to live in China for couple months a year. And till now, they still havn't found a solution.
What's your opinion?
Forgive my English

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Post time 2006-6-1 08:12:32 |Display all floors
i know one thing that if i ever marry to craig..he wouldnt live in China....it is just too different from his cuture..and i cant expect him to live in china with me..it is not fiar for him..since he has to learn the language..culture....he might choose to live in the states.....

i sometimes think maybe its better to find a chinese to marry to....at least life will be so much easier....
I don't know if I like you or love you, want you or need you, all I know is I love the feeling I get when I'm near you.

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Post time 2006-6-1 10:25:26 |Display all floors
I spend about 1/3 of my time in China now and the othe 2/3 in the US.  I travel and spend so much time in different parts of the country that I feel comfortable almost everywhere so life in China would not be too difficult of a change.  But I have kids in school here in the US so until they are on their own, my factory is doing well enough for me to take early retirement or I just get sick of working I will continue to jump back and forth.  I have 2 homes in China now and will buy another one in a couple of years so I can follow the seasons and never worry about the weather.   My wife is thrilled at the idea so that one is easy.
One of every 4 people is mentaly  ill. Think of your
3 best friends, if they're okay, it's you.

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Post time 2006-6-1 10:50:23 |Display all floors

Well

Life is easier for the riches.
No. I am just sour grapes.
I guess you are more capable to adapt that's why it is easier for you two.
Forgive my English

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Post time 2006-6-1 11:00:52 |Display all floors
life is hard work and I hope one day to be able to relax and enjoy it before I drop dead and my wife and kids get to have all the fun
One of every 4 people is mentaly  ill. Think of your
3 best friends, if they're okay, it's you.

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Rank: 8Rank: 8

Post time 2006-6-1 12:33:25 |Display all floors

I'd be open to trying

Originally posted by holidays at 2006-6-1 07:05
How about a western woman married to a Chinese man in US or other western country. The Chinese man thinks that China is more a place to him, which is a very common view for the oversea professional ...


I can't say for sure yet until I've lived in China long enough to kow what it's really like, but I know I would certainly try. If I really didn't like it, I would live part time in each country.

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Post time 2006-6-2 02:17:47 |Display all floors

Holiday's

"That means the woman in this case will have to comprimise more. Am I right?"

I am not so sure about this but as of now you are right.  My fiance gives up a career, seeing her friends and family often,
as well as numerous other things.  She also spends some of her money to help her family.  It is my mission to show her
something even better.  She is compromising but so am I.  For a while a will be supporting us while she gets the best
English lessons and schooling available.  This will be for a career that she chooses.  During this time I will be
supporting our family---and that includes her parents.  In time, my fiance, will have more earning power and
independence than she could dream of.  

True love is a powerful thing.  I had never known it before and thus never married.  She may have some uncertainty about
what she is leaving behind (we will visit China),  but I guarantee you that if we have this conversation a year from now she
will tell you that her compromise had a very positive impact in her life.  And mine as well.  Many of the worries that she
has now in China will never haunt her again.  What is so great is that my happiness is her central most thought----and
my happiness revolves around seeing her smile and be happy.  It is a good combination and I hope we retain this connection.

[ Last edited by tarheel23 at 2006-6-2 02:20 AM ]

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