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Carrie you will just have to do all the approaching. These guys are so shy because they have been told all their lives that women don't want men, except for marriage.
Most Chinese men cannot image a woman having 'desire', they think that is only what 'dirty men' have. Every notice Chinese women dressing very sexy, but if a man looks at her, they act like he is a monster man? They are not dressing for ,MEN; but for themselves, after years of drab female clothing...meant to be androgenous, and netural. That was the point, no female, no male. Man and woman as workers. Not sex objects.
This is the ambivilance they carry around with them. Naturally the man is afraid of rejection. Now, of course, the new Chinese woman is much different she is trying to put aside that old female chauvinism, but it is not easy, after years of mother telling them 'men are dirty'.
Don't give up, once you score; you have a terrific guy.