Author: cecilia_xiao

the man i love called me cheater last night [Copy link] 中文

Rank: 1

Post time 2005-1-14 00:42:25 |Display all floors

me too

hi...i'm a eiropean man that is oin love with chinese girl tha ti met in China this summer.
reading your message i felt a bit gulty..cause me too i was very suspected by her..maybe for the distance maybe also because i ve known many girl not very fear...
I understand that u r a one good girl as mine gf..but for us (MEN) sometime is difficult to belive if we do not see..and if we do not see it'0s easy to think in a bad way...
I DO NOT KNOW HOW U AND YOUR BF Would carry on..if u ll go to live in Uk or him in China but i belive that for stay well together..need to be in the same place..the distance is too big...
good luck to u and to me too (by Dragon2)

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Rank: 4

Post time 2005-1-14 01:27:53 |Display all floors

Xiphoid's right. Inexperiece and immaturity makes people lost in their dreams.

It's so easy to portray a personality on the internet which is so far from what u really are. Neverthless, if one can remain objective, one can judge a person from his words. However, when you have begun weaving webs of dreams of getting together with someone, you get trapped in it. U lose ur ability to be objective. U begin to feel helpless at ur inability to make up ur mind. There might be apparent lapses in his/her anecdotes that make u smell a rat. But ur affection for him/her just coerces u to believe everything's fine.
For this man of urs too, he's got something in his mind and it's not gonna wash away easily. The fact that he called u afterwards does mean that he isn't really cold on u. I think u shud just wait a while and see if he does attempt to reach u somehow sometime. I keep my fingers crossed.

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Rank: 4

Post time 2005-1-14 01:33:12 |Display all floors


U used to be a dai chinese if my memory serves me right. How come u be a "eiropean" now?

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Post time 2005-1-14 01:34:50 |Display all floors

oh this is a different drag huh!

I just saw that u have a rather few posts. So u are gonna keep up to ur name and be Drag II.....?

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Rank: 4

Post time 2005-1-14 03:37:24 |Display all floors

On Xiphoid's response: Yes and no . . .

Yes, your view about a relationship in the western world is well understood.

No, what you saw in this forum about Chinese girls belongs to the extreme minority, some of whom (please excuse me) are misunderstanding western culture and / or just chasing after foreigners as a fashion or otherwise.

No matter, a relationship must be fair and just for it to nourish and flourish!

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Rank: 4

Post time 2005-1-14 19:27:47 |Display all floors


I'm sorry to hear about that
I do think it's one of the pitfalls of online romances - that kind of misunderstanding just couldn't happen in real life.

I fell for a girl online about four years ago now.  It made me open my eyes.  It wasn't real - I didn't really love her at all.  
I chat with quite a few girls online now  -I've never met any of them (yet).  I would never get into that kind of long-distance relationship though.  I think chatting casually with someone is fine, and if you find you have a lot in common and aren't too far from each other then arrange to meet up and see what happens.

I know long-term romances CAN work.  But imho I dpn't think it is possible to really love someone who you have never met.

I don't know what to advise.  The guy sounds like a bit of a control-freak to me.  Maybe he wants a nice, dismissive wife who he can order around.  I don't know.
Jealousy is not a good trait though.  The warning signs are there.

Hope you reach a satisfactory conclusion.

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Rank: 4

Post time 2005-1-14 23:00:36 |Display all floors

he's too jealous for you,sweetie

i'm gonna say something, that may appear harsh, but he seems to be a overly jealous guy, and believe me, you're better off without him.

Long distance relationships really are hard.i know that from my experience. and in my case it didn't work out, but for different reasons. we're friends now.

what i mean, is that for a good and healthy relationship you need trust, you need warmth..

.you don't need people accusing you of things before hearing your explanation...and not trusting you enough.

at least he should have given you the benefit of the doubt!  i guess that he has had realtionship in the past, where he's been cheated, and now he can't imagine somebody wanting to be with him, and only with him. he has seen probably too much.

he's gonna make you cry again. not for once, i'm sure.
it sounds bad, and ugly, but you seem to me like a reasonable girl who deserves better.

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