Author: fly2heaven

lesbian or heterosexual? [Copy link] 中文

Rank: 4

Post time 2005-7-2 23:48:53 |Display all floors

Hi all

First I'd like to say I could live a peaceful quiet life without sex. I know what I want, love. True love has nothing to do with looks, money, color and sex etc. Yes it has nothing to do with sex. Good luck to you all.

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Rank: 1

Post time 2005-7-3 00:53:56 |Display all floors

fly2heaven

I think it's very important to not put yourself and others into categories. I believe that sexuality and gender exist in a very broad spectrum, and there might not necessary be clear distinctions within. Straight women can have "lesbian" tendencies and have sex with women, as well as gay-identified men who have had sex with women because of physical attractions. But how straight is straight? How lesbian is lesbian really?
A lot of gays and lesbian grow up identifying themselves with the opposite sex because of their hormones. However, there are also socio-psychological factors that can shape one's sexual orientation.

I say I'm Bi when people ask me, and it is very frustrating sometimes when people try to convince me that I'm straight but like the kinkiness of making out with another woman, when in fact I can fall in love with and am physically attracted to both sex.

Whichever the case is, maybe you shouldn't worry so much about labelling yourself as straight/lesbian, or pressure yourself into making a decision about it. Experiment a bit, open yourself to opportunities, and most of all, make yourself happy.

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Rank: 4

Post time 2005-7-3 14:57:35 |Display all floors

Flytoheaven needs love, not sex

Sometimes, you just need to be honest with yourself, and perhaps also with your friends (especially the female friends, if you want a lifelong, loving relationship with them).

After months of these postings, maybe you know that the kind of sex is not important.  When you meet someone who makes you feel loved and secure, you should take your courage in your hand and be honest with them about your feelings.

Perhaps in a conservative area, you must be careful first, but you also must try not to lose your opportunity for love out of fear.  

Take your time, and be hopeful.  

(For an English Lesson for all the posters out there: the word for a gay person is a homosexual, many are homosexuals, they practice homosexuality.  There is no "homosexualer").  Ciao bella!

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Rank: 4

Post time 2005-7-3 18:04:24 |Display all floors

thanks ibugsy & leungshuren

thanks for all your nice words. I feel much better now than several months ago, not anxious to identy or catogorize myself as les or bi or straight. I will try to establish relationship with nice man, not woman. In china better do the same as my peers do  to avoid pressure or hurt from people around. I think I probably become sexually active if I meet the right man, the true love, maybe wanna nice sex to him everyday. Good sex just serves to maintain emotional bond, it does good to a stable relationship. A patient, caring responsible man who doesn't mind to know  a woman's feelings, thoughts will make her relaxed, loved, offering her the sense of security.  How many percentage of men don't mind to know their gf or wives' feelings and thoughts? Am I too fragile or imature  that I pay too much attention to emotional needs?

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