Author: fly2heaven

lesbian or heterosexual? [Copy link] 中文

Rank: 4

Post time 2004-11-30 22:24:15 |Display all floors

Some of my posts are serious

like the ones about my current (just finished) relationship.   
Some of them are very light-hearted.
This is a kind of cross between the two.

You say that you find men untrustworthy.  That's not a good reason to turn to lesbianism.  There's so many guys out there - you can't judge the whole population by just a handful.
There are good and bad guys out there - good and bad women too.

If you genuinely find that girls turn you on while all men do nothing for you then I would agree you're a lesbian.
But if you're just speaking from a few bad experiences with guys......I would say don't be so hasty.

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Rank: 4

Post time 2004-11-30 22:36:25 |Display all floors

ilunga

I was speaking not from a few bad experience. I was born in a family my dad is a sexist and my parents think women are inferiors to men. My elder brother was spoiled and he was far from being a nice caring bro. I can't feel the love from my parents, my mom always being impatient and picky with me but very nice caring with her hus, son and grandson. I didn't even dare to touch her  though I wanted so much to being close to her in my memory.

True I did experience some bad past which really have no interest in men any more. In my eyes, men are selfish, not devoted... in general case. ...

I don't know if the right person for me will be a woman or man. I only want true love in daily life for the rest of my life, emotionally stable happy family life. The person will be devoted, patient, loving caring and warm in nature.

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Post time 2004-11-30 22:44:37 |Display all floors

Sorry to hear about your family situation

However, there are a lot of guys out there who would treat you well.

Hope you make the right choice.

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Post time 2004-12-1 03:37:34 |Display all floors

"Fly2heaven" You are NOT the only one that is confused !

I disagree with one of the contributor in this Forum that you know you are gay or lesbian when you are born.

"Most" gays and lesbians actually do not know their sexual orientation until in their teens when they start to be sexually active.

Due to the cultural/societal/family value in CHINA, homosexuality is still being looked at as deviant and counter-revolution and not "COMING OUT" !

It is very sad and unless you live in a large city like Beijing or Shanghai which have a large gay and lesbian community, it is quite difficult to meet other lesbians.

"Sexual identity crisis" is clearly a problem for many lesbians in CHINA in which they have experienced sex with men but found themselves not attractive  to them and have not meet the "RIGHT" lesbian partner to share their life together.

So I wish "Fly2heaven" good luck to find your true soulmate to share your life !

Remember. it is NOT just a sexual orientation but a life style and marry for life with your soulmate who just happened to be a female and making love to her is  just part of the relationship but there are more to support each other.

Some of my lesbians friends are very artistic and are really nice people and highly educated and lawyers too !

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Rank: 4

Post time 2004-12-1 03:50:23 |Display all floors

Fly2heaven , your case is NOT unique and actually serve as a reminder forALL men

Fly2heaven, your case is NOT unique and actually serve as a reminder for ALL men in CHINA to treat our sisters nice and not to harrass them.

Especially women in the central CHINA and rural areas, women are treated as second class citizen and I BLAST against such sexual discrimination against our Chinese women !

This is especially true to many so-called "Fathers" in the rural area in which they prefer a son than a daughter !

It is  time to change our traditional value and nuture our Chinese daughters, cherish them, give them love and provide them with everything and bring them up in our Chinese society as equal as a man.

A Chinese woman can be a Fighter Pilot, an astronant, a nuclear physicist, anything you can be and love the person you choose and it does not matter whether the person is a man or woman as long as the "person' truly love you !!!

Because of your bad experience with many male figures especially in your family or some bad heterosexual relationship, you are exploring different channels to see if just a "person" will be your friend for life and it does not matter whether the "person" is male or "female".

You may turn into a lesbian due to circumstances beyond your control and I certainly understand your viewpoint.

Many lesbians live a double life in CHINA and get married but have very intimate girlfriends !

Again, I wish the best for you !

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Rank: 4

Post time 2004-12-1 11:19:23 |Display all floors

ilunga

thanks

My parents are actually nice peeple in nature. I think my mom is a victim of sexist for she gives a lot of love to my dad but receives little. I don't think she lives a happy life.

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Post time 2004-12-1 11:42:24 |Display all floors

Hey Canadianguy...

You left out one, a UNISEXUAL is one who screws everything and anyone in sight. A better name for it is an ASSH**LE. LOL (just joking)

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