My kids are looking for a father figure - Friendship, Love, Relationships - Chinadaily Forum
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My kids are looking for a father figure [Copy link] 中文

Rank: 1

Post time 2018-3-15 18:47:15 |Display all floors

I had a divorce a year ago. I have 3 kids in my care. One is 6 years old, second is 5, and the last is still 2. To be honest, it’s tiring at times but I’m working hard for them. I don’t want them to live with nothing in their tummies and pockets. I guess with my work, I can sustain their needs and wants. I want what’s best for my kids.


Just recently, my two kids are looking for a father figure. I was astounded yet felt irresponsible by not giving them the chance to live without a father caring and loving them. But am I not enough? I’m doing my best for them and it should be enough. But still, that thought won’t come out from my head.


So I tried dating. I called some of my friends on whom to date. They gave me some site names but I think I’d be so desperate if I do so. So I ended up going to online dating. There I saw an ad for international dating social event. So I posted some of my pictures, trying it not be showy and agreed to attend the event.


Do you think I’ve made the right decision? Is this move a smart one? Please tell me so. I appreciate your responses!





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Rank: 6Rank: 6

Post time 2018-3-17 08:44:59 |Display all floors
This post was edited by zhihu1 at 2018-3-17 09:19

Do you expect any Western man would like to help you raise your three children?
Perish the illusion. More and more Western men wouldn't like to get married, even after they father the children of their partners, because they wouldn't risk to pay alimony in case they have to end their marriage one day unless they're quite sure you're the one.  Besides that, many Western men are drug addicts.

Why would they marry you? You're not going to find a father-figure for your children, but would likely end up finding a Father Santa-turn-husband for yourself. What I mean is that Western guy is very likely much older than you.

Even you have divorced your exhusband, he still bears the parental responsibilities to the children of both yours, except for paying money to them. You should demand this for your children, no matter how you hate each other.



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Rank: 8Rank: 8

Post time 2018-5-4 19:38:19 |Display all floors
A lot of western men like the idea of a ready made family , all the hard work has been done and the kids are at the age where their personality starts to develope , I think you would find drug addicts in all countries not just western , as a good mother trying to do the best for her kids there are many other options for you to find father figures , enrole the older two into a martial arts class with a male instructor , they will learn many things from this not just how to protect themselves
There are no Ugly women , only those with low self esteem .

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