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Why you want to become someone else? Why cannot you be just yourselves?

Popularity 10Viewed 8143 times 2015-10-23 18:59 |Personal category:Life|System category:Life| Just


This blog post is completely different from my previous posts. Today, I am not going to talk more about China but about a growing problem among many people. This phenomenon has always been there but now it looks in much larger proportion among ourselves.

There was a time, when I faced loneliness and wanted someone besides me just to talk. This was not a good feeling but soon I have developed a mechanism to cope up with it. I have started to invest time in writing, painting and reading whenever I felt such situation. Now, I no longer feel such situation. But, I have realized the need to help others who might be in the same situation as mine and unable to speak up due to various reasons. It is true that in today's times, we tend to hide our true-selves behind the curtains of social media, pleasant looking pictures or just looking at virtual happiness. So the need to speak and reflect our true inner-self is necessary, even if this 

Often this does not happen because people do not trust others in sharing some information. This can be often a break-up, work stress or simply uncontrolled emotions. No one at present wants to look weaker and this prohibit us to share such darker side of ours. It can gets worse, if the person keep sitting on it for a longer duration. Sharing just heals and liberates our mind.

Few months ago, I have joined a listeners website '7 cups of tea', which allows anyone to speak up about his/her problem without revealing the identity. At the same platform, many people like me are voluntarily giving our ears as listeners to those in need. This entire platform connects those who need help and those who wants help. The entire conversation is always anonymous. I can never know other person and vice versa is also true. So, I can only listen and try to understand his/her situation from the texts being typed in the chat box. 

I have improved my listening capability and felt great to listen many people in past few months.  However, there is something which disturbs me a lot and I came across this very often. After thinking for a long time on question of writing this in public or not, it is time that you can also be aware of this. 

There were many guys who were depressed in life and felt that they will not be able to become something they wanted to be. When I have asked, why you think so? They told, everyone around them is successful, getting love from others and moving in the life. Again, I asked, aren't you moving in life? Many person replied, that they are not.  I cannot dilute more information here from such conversations. But, all I found is that people were so obsessed by becoming celebrities, becoming the photo shoot person. At 3 years ago, they saw a person with nice smile fighting a immigrant case and they enrolled for the law school. Now, in the 2nd year, they do not see a future in law because this is what they never wanted to do. They quit the law school and tried aspiring for movie, because movie stars always gets every kind of publicity. It also did not work out and then they tried something else and something else. Now, they are under huge depression and still feel that other people are better. The social media picture of others humiliate them everyday and they just do not see any value in their own life. I am refraining myself from giving more information about such cases. 

In all, I could not understand why people want to become someone else? Why they cannot be just themselves? 

Has anyone of you has answer to my question 'why people want to become someone else?' 'why they cannot be just themselves?'

(Opinions of the writer in this blog don't represent those of China Daily.)

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Reply Report RonJaDa 2016-9-28 01:59
I agree advisors need to share experiences good and bad, but also advise people to find and follow their own path.

Like when people that are famous actors and actresses, tell people how they should vote
well just because they know how to act and got lucky breaks does not mean they are the fountain of knowledge.
Likewise as you say, just because the path was successful for them it does not mean it  will be for others

They need to share their strategies that can be applied to your own dream or path and we must remember  paths take unexpected changes sometimes we need to follow those changes too.

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  • Why you want to become someone else? Why cannot you be just yourselves? 2016-9-28 01:59

    I agree advisors need to share experiences good and bad, but also advise people to find and follow their own path.

    Like when people that are famous actors and actresses, tell people how they should vote
    well just because they know how to act and got lucky breaks does not mean they are the fountain of knowledge.
    Likewise as you say, just because the path was successful for them it does not mean it  will be for others

    They need to share their strategies that can be applied to your own dream or path and we must remember  paths take unexpected changes sometimes we need to follow those changes too.

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