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I agree, it is a long way from "traditional" Chinese thinking - but as strong as any tradition is, it is always changing and evolving to the demands of society.
Chinese society today has evolved from what existed one hundred or more years ago, when the demands and expectations of society set what was then the "best social norm", i.e. to satisfy and please one's parents at all times.
The "80's child" is leading a revolution in Chinese society, that was sanctioned and approved by the governments of the day, through "Reform & Opening Up". Now that the children of that time are parents themselves, adapting and creating new expectations, which results in a change in the traditions.
From the comments of my colleagues in China, they do not like to do this, as it brings shame (loss of face) on their parents, in the eyes of their neighbours and other family members. All those who observe it can see that the relationship is false, as there is no love or passion in the "relationship".
It used to be traditional in Europe to go out with a large knot of wood, find a "suitable" partner, club her on the head and drag your "wife" back to the cave....... However that is no longer an accepted norm - societal pressure has forced a change of tradition.
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