Author: xilaren

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Post time 2008-1-29 22:31:32 |Display all floors
[quote]Originally posted by xilaren at 2008-1-29 03:58

As it is always a good thing for the relationship returned or backed up.
I have a friend,for some religious reasons that I thought I should give her up,somethings from her are very silly,ignorant and I lost my patience with her every day in life. she always thinks her way of thinking and doing things are correct,even the food she tried is healthier than local Chinese even western foods.
When she tried to help me sth, she has to do it before her husband coming back to office.
or even get permission of her husband.
I am trying harder to keep the relationship with her,
I even wish i would move out of this city all suddenly to cut off all with her..
***always to be yourself***

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Post time 2008-1-29 23:21:56 |Display all floors
Originally posted by xilaren at 2008-1-27 19:26
I had a very good friend in China.One day she stopped writing to me abruptly.
I was really worried about her so I sent her  e-mails expressing my worries about her absence.
I received no answer.I ...


You sounds very nice person with a easy forgiving heart. I guess she has her own life after she get married... and it's not so conveninet to talk with you if she with her husband everyday..you know Chinese man is very easy to get jealous .if he saw her wife still writing you the mail to care about you so much !

so you still can reply her..just don't put all your heart on her ...you still can make other friends..you know the people can be changed when she found her another half....because she is alone earlier..that's why she also care about you so much..but when she get married..she is not alone at all now...her husband are instead of you...

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Post time 2008-1-30 06:35:43 |Display all floors
Originally posted by 246810 at 2008-1-29 23:21


You sounds very nice person with a easy forgiving heart. I guess she has her own life after she get married... and it's not so conveninet to talk with you if she with her husband everyday..you  ...

In conclusion she was a person with no stability.She has shown me signs of this character also in the past.
If somebody is worrying about us we have the moral obligation to send some lines explaining that we are busy but well .
This kind of behaviour is unknown to me and  hate it a lot.
Of course I am not investing emotionally anymore to her.Everybody is judged by his behaviour and I have no time to give room to people who are irresponsible.I have written back to her but our friendship has been
cracked.Not enthusiasm ,not deep feelings any more.Just a typical contact out of politeness I can say.
It is impossible to have the same place in my heart again.This is what I believe now.I do not know about the future.
I really    love China,半个 中国 人

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Post time 2008-1-30 10:44:33 |Display all floors
Originally posted by seneca at 2008-1-30 10:40
I had a pure and Platonic friendship with an unusually bright and experienced Chiense woman aged 28. She told me, among other things, she had been to prison for speaking her mind.

And speak she ...


Seneca, what are you making out of her disappearance then? It is kinda of mixed story. Did she disappear on her own to distant herself from you or she was forced to disappear?

I hope she is fine now.

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Post time 2008-1-30 11:49:35 |Display all floors
Originally posted by seneca at 2008-1-30 10:40
I had a pure and Platonic friendship with an unusually bright and experienced Chiense woman aged 28. She told me, among other things, she had been to prison for speaking her mind.

And speak she ...


For some uncertain reasons that the lady tried to escape from you.
***always to be yourself***

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Post time 2008-1-30 11:57:31 |Display all floors
Originally posted by xilaren at 2008-1-30 06:35

In conclusion she was a person with no stability.She has shown me signs of this character also in the past.
If somebody is worrying about us we have the moral obligation to send some lines expla ...


by instinctly,I still agree with force's suggestion to give a friendship a new chance.
In China, preparing marriage is a kind of activities involved with lots of things and friends and matters. I believe your friend is too busy to prepare her marriage date.
Sometimes,when I am too busy I donot even have chance to open my mail box.
For me,her ingorances are understanding.
In reality,when some old friends lost contact suddenly,which proved sth wrong and drastically changing of her and his life.
One time,my bf told me he used to get contact with one of his client,suddenly he never email him back,It proves later his potential client encountered car accident and died in accident.
I do not judge one's behavior by one time,two times or three times.It's not that simple.
***always to be yourself***

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Post time 2008-1-30 12:59:39 |Display all floors
Originally posted by seneca at 2008-1-30 11:35
Hmmm, do you think I know the answer? I am in a sentimental quandary, that's what I am. She certainly did NOT distance herself from me, neither physically nor mentally. Her departure was abrupt, un ...


Okay, thanks for the recommended book. Have a happy Chinese Little New Year!

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