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is it common to have sex with friends in western countries? [Copy link] 中文

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Post time 2005-3-7 17:27:34 |Display all floors
my friend has a lot of experience with his friends but he never loves them and they are just friends.he said sex is just animal desire and you can enjoy most with the one you love but it doesnt mean that you cant do it with others even without love.do you think he is right?

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Post time 2005-3-7 18:40:01 |Display all floors

sex without love, maybe true, but sex with friends...

Your friend is right that It is possible to have sex without love, for men or women.  

Your friend is a pig if he thinks of sex as animal desire that can be performed between friends, siblings, children and parents..... in the west or in China.  Feelings between friends should be similar to those between siblings.  So, what do you think?

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Post time 2005-3-7 20:52:11 |Display all floors

He is right!

I have the same opinion as your friend.

Some consider sex as an activity which can procure pleasure such as having a good meal, playing tennis, going to the movies...

Although I think sex is better when done with someone you love, you can do it with a friend and it can be good too. Who said that you have to have sex only with the guy you marry (in the bibble may be?)

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Post time 2005-3-8 01:37:01 |Display all floors

to be honest

I find that idea to be quite repulsive.

Your friend is wrong about the west.  We do not have sex with our friends.  We are not a bunch of unfeeling animals over here.  Not saying there aren't rare cases where friends do, but that's neither considered normal or common.

It's not that uncommon to have sex here without love.  But when friendship is involved, it's a whole different story.  Not to say that people can't go from friends to bf/gf, but that's different than what you are talking about.  Most of us don't just have sex with normal friends.

Maybe I'm being an alarmist, but your friend either has a very false impression of the west or maybe he has ulterior motives.

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Post time 2005-3-8 04:25:55 |Display all floors

Reply: is it common to have sex with friends in western countries?

Your “friend” is a j*rk.  He is just trying to manipulate you by implying the you are not sophisticated like Westerns.  

Yes, sex is an animal desire, but all animals have some type of mating ritual/practice for determining which member of their species they will mate with.

And if your “friend” is trying to convince you to have sex with him, just tell him to go have sex with some of his other friends.  I’m sure is other friends will have no problem satisfying is animal desires.

When it come time for you “friend” to marry a woman, do you think he will want a woman that has casual sex with her friends, or will he look for a woman that is a virgin?

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Post time 2005-3-8 04:55:25 |Display all floors

Whitedevil, It is interesting for some subspecies of chimpanzee to engage in sex

I happened to study biology in college and was amazed  how chimpanzee engaged in unique sexual activities when they are captured in zoo.

The study was based on "captured chimpanzee" and direct observation of the sexual behaviour of "captured" chimpanzees. The male chimpanzee may just engage in sexual activities with one female chimpanzee and rest for a while and jump on another female chimpanzee.

But other observation of chimpanzee in natural environement also shows a specific courtship and a male chimpazee may engage in some kind of "consortship" with a female chimpanzee and run away for 3-4  weeks in the forest alone in mating !

There is quite a difference between captured and "naturally raised" chimpanzees. This is proven with the enlarged, red , hot, raw, peripheral skins of the female "captured" chimpanzees which in some cases swollen to 10 cm. The entire peripheral skin become red hot indicating they are in heat and want to engage in sex !


Despite their unique sexual behaviour, the female chimpanzee does exhibit maternal instinct to nuture the baby chimp !!

I hope this answer your interesting comments that NOT all animals have particular ritual/practice to choose their mates when they are in captivity!

This example mirrors the American slaves back in the 1800's in which they were not treated as "normal" human beings and "some" of the mating pattern is strictly for sexual pleasure and reproductive purposes for the slave owners.

Thank you very much for your input !!

<<<Whitedevil, PLEASE BE VERY GENTLE WITH MY COMMENTS, IT IS JUST AN OBSERVATION !  DON'T OVERREACT TO MY COMMENT AND START A PERSONAL ATTACK !!!>>>>

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Post time 2005-3-8 05:46:57 |Display all floors

Reply: Whitedevil, It is interesting for some subspecies of chimpanzee to engage

I agree with you observation with regards to some primates that evolved in sub-Sahara.  But even primates practice are practicing a mating strategy.  They basically have a much sex a possible as a strategy.  

To confirm your observation, the decedents of the “slave owners” can be observed “mating” for strictly sexual pleasure in Shanghai and other major chinese cities as we speak (or should I say post).

I’m suggesting that a the original poster not be misled by her Western friend into practicing sub-Saharan mating strategies. For neither she nor the Western evolved in sub-Sahara Africa.

Not sure that I have ever “overreacted” or “personally attacked” anybody.  Though I have been at the receiving end of such behavior on many occasions.

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