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Should I accept his love?? [Copy link] 中文

Rank: 4

Post time 2004-7-12 13:47:46 |Display all floors
I'm a Chinese girl from Beijing and now I have a tough problem which makes me feel so puzzled and sad.

I met an American guy who is 15 years older than me, he is 39 but  I'm 24. We got to know each other gradually and naturally, eventually we both have great feelings toward each other. But since I knew our age difference, so I always reminded myself to back off a little. But I also know he is very sincere to me. I admit he has a great personality and characteristics, very mature, responsible, and faithful. As a man, he has all the foundations to form a family, the most important thing is he is ready to have his own family, he is eager for it. He treats me very well and I have nothing to complain. It seems I have nothing to doubt on him, except the age problem.

He is going to visit me from US to Beijing and spend his vacation here. So now it's time for me to think about our relationship really seriously and carefully. I should give him a very clear attitude but not always vague when he comes. I don't want to miss my Mr. Right (if he really is), cause I don't want to use my entire life to regret. But now I don't know if I should accpet his love and dedicate my love to him completely. Just ignore the age difference?? But it's 15 years difference, it's not a small one. Or just ask him to forget me even if it hurts me as well?? So please help me and give me some opinions, how should I do now??

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Rank: 4

Post time 2004-7-12 14:13:35 |Display all floors

What do u really want from this love?

If u think money or sth material is what u want, then it's OK.
If u really go for a love, then think again what's difference between him and othe men from a view of independent bystander. Then u can make ur choice.
Good luck and God bless u.

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Rank: 1

Post time 2004-7-12 15:12:36 |Display all floors


It is well known that American living level is much higher than chinese's, so if the mentioned man only spend a little part of his salary on you,maybe you will feel satisfied very much.

Whatmore if the man is really very excellent, possibly his child is more than ten years old, so don't trust his.

You are so yong and you will meet a proper boyfriend to build yourself small family happily.

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Rank: 1

Post time 2004-7-12 15:23:52 |Display all floors

go for it

as in all relationship, you have to try it first to see if it works out..

if you like this guy and feel atracted to him, have a realtionship...but as in all cases, try it , and if it works for you go a step further... take it slow...

you might date a bit more seriously first, then perhaps spend more time together, eventually move in together....

that doesnt mean, you have to be married or anything... if he tryes to get you to move to USA, or to marry , or anything that drastic, just think about you really want to do that? i guess  you dont...but if there is love, he wont rush you into anything....

if you can think about it rationally, that means the ratio is in control , not love... you see, LOVE is not logical.

Stay cool, and cheer up! you seem sad (thats strange, if your LOVE is coming to town, isnt it?) , think about it

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Rank: 4

Post time 2004-7-12 15:30:07 |Display all floors


It is not easy for a girl  to encounter a lover that love you deeply in her life. I think you can understand it and you have think a lot of this problem. In my opinion I feel there are two problems between you and your bf. One is your different background. I do not know how about you know his country ,culture, custom,life style and other things. Perhaps these problems are very important for you at present. But the many different life habits of you that have been formed in different regious will influence your future marriage life. Your bf in your eyes is a responsible, mature ,faithful is really? How long did you keep with him? You know a girl that fall in love with  is miraculous. I feel you should think about him clearly and see the fact seriously.
The two is his age. You always mentioned his age in your message. I feel you care about this problem. Due to your care I think the age problem will be a obstacle between you and your bf. Ask your heart deeply whether you would overcome this age difference. If not ,pls give up as early as possible.   
Good luck for you.

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Rank: 4

Post time 2004-7-12 16:36:30 |Display all floors

Thanks for all these opinoins!

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Rank: 4

Post time 2004-7-12 17:21:29 |Display all floors

Go for it!

I'm American and my wife is Chinese. I'm 39 and my wife is...well that's her little secret.

We're married and decided to stay and live in China, where we are happy, have bought a home and lead a very pleasent life.

Go for it girl! Listen to your heart and go for it!

Good luck !

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