How WeChat Helped to Maintain My Positive Face
2016-03-07
A very short one.Long time no see. 
Not long ago, one of my high school classmates, with whom I have lost contact for five years, surprisingly talked to me via WeChat.
He said he wanted to ask me for some professional advice of being a journalist. I said ok, though I am not professional at all.
We were having a nice conversation on the daily work of a reporter. Yes, my whole attention was focusing on the limited journalistic experiences of mine.
Then a message of him bumped in, I stopped typing, to read his message.
In a moment a picture of his face took over my screen!
I was stunned. “What the xx is that?” And then his asked me: “You think I am more handsome than five years ago?”
If I was talking to him face to face, I would by all means reply: “What’s wrong with your mind?” And I indeed typed “你有病啊。”
Luckily I didn’t send this message to him because I suddenly realized it would destroy his impression of me. I used to be so polite and nice. If I send this message to him, I would not only threaten my positive face but also his.
So after I cooled down I stared at his face and retyped the message. It reads: “Oh, you look whiter than before!” He said thanks. And at last we had a very nice conversation.
I have to say WeChat give me the time and space to rethink what I want to say. Through WeChat what you can give to your interactant is not the instant answer but the more appropriate one. And even if you have send them an awkward reply, your will be able to withdraw(撤回) it within two minutes.
Some people are especially emotional, like me, but thanks to the time and space WeChat give me, so that I can get my sense back before I say something stupid.
Wow it's been such a long time since I log in this site last time. Now I looked back at this article and sort of found myself naive to write this, becasue it's really no big thing haha. I didn't even remember the context he asked that question. Though it's awkard. I agree with you it's more like flirting. But I had always been playing the nice people when I was in high school. Now I'm more straighforward and honest. But still, when I'm talking to someone I'm not familiar with, I would try to be nice.
Was he good looking five years ago?
If he looked sick and worse than he did five years earlier you would think he would know that himself so his question strikes me as being kind of odd. For him to ask you would think that he must believe himself to be more attractive than he was five years earlier. I dont get it. Maybe he earns more money than he did five years ago when you knew him and because of his payscale he is doing better with the ladies now and this has made him think that he has gotten more handsome. What other explanation could there be?
I think that tact is good but it should be honest. Saying that someone looks whiter rather than telling them that they look sick or anemic is probably better but Chinese associate white skin with beauty dont they? Maybe it would have been better to say no - you do not look more handsome than you did five years ago. It is kind of a jerk question if you think about it and it probably deserved a jerk answer. Even if he was more attractive than he was five years earlier what kind of question is that to ask someone?
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