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What Would You Say to Your Beloved
2014-08-26

For the old generation Chinese parents, most of them prefer boys to girls. But nowadays parents also like girls probably they think girls are easier to be raised, for example more obedient and usually have more filial affections for their parents and so on.

Apparently I am female, but I also admit that sometimes my personality has some boys’ characteristics, especially when I was a little girl. For instance, I really hate people around me like my family members or friends say I should do this or I shouldn't do that, although most of time I love them very much. Now I have grown up, I think I will never shout to them and reply: “It is none of your business about this!” But I think for most people, if someone forces you to do or not to do something, you would probably like to do the opposite.

Let me elaborate this with more examples. Since now I am not working, my family members sometimes suggest me that I should get an easy job to do first and then see other opportunities, but the fact is that I want to do a job which has some career prospects, and I don’t want to become a “try and error and then try again” person. Also about my love relationships, some of my family members or friends would ask: “Why not have dates with that guy?” The problem might be that I don’t think he really fits me, and I would probably prefer to have a long-term relationship. Many times I really feel frustrated about their advice, although I think they may want to be good to me.

I think I am a grown-up, most of time obviously I know quite much what I should do or what I am going to do next. So if you were me, what would you say to those you really love but with different opinions? Please feel free to share your ideas with me.

Comment

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Celandine0910 2014-08-30 21:09

I can see you are overly pessimistic about love although I don't know the reasons. I am afraid I am on the opposite side.

liu5222512 2014-08-30 17:55

Save a place for yourself, before going out to love. 
You don‘t have to know who to love, how to love, or how long your love will last.
Just wait for the one time. Maybe there will never be the one. But just wait, because it already is your reward.

Celandine0910 2014-08-28 11:00

I never said work should be first! I hope my career can go in parallel with my love relationship (and that is what I did in my school days)~ I think I need both of them in my life. But if I can only choose one, I will always choose the latter. I think a good family is more important.

liu5222512 2014-08-28 07:36

Very good answers glitter with your wisdom.
Learn a lot.

liu5222512 2014-08-28 07:19

There is no such an answer to that question.
As you are grown-up,and in the very lowest recesses of your own heart,you also know it's time to marry.

Still achieving,still pursuing.
Learn to labor and wait.

As you said,work first.

Celandine0910 2014-08-27 22:19

Oh thanks, you gave a NICE comment for everyone. 

ColinSpeakman 2014-08-27 22:09

It shows that they care, but it is your life!

Celandine0910 2014-08-27 22:05

Thanks for your comment. You gave an excellent illustration about how different parents think about their children.  

Celandine0910 2014-08-27 21:57

Thanks. I don't agree with you a bit. In fact I would like to have a secure job and marry soon, but I also have my own expectations about these big things in my life, I just don't want to improvise (凑合) about my career or marriage. I hope you could understand this.

juzunme 2014-08-27 18:46

Parents know best. So should listen to parent. 
But civil servant parents think you should follow a structured career path.
Business parents wants you to take risk and try your hands in business.
Artist parents thinks it's ok for kids to go round the world before settling down.
Asian parents want their sons to have good career first then wife.
Western parents want their kids to move out when they are 18 in order to be independent.
Parents know best based on their background and their own experience.
No parents would want their kids to be games developer because that job did not exist in their time.
Talk to people, see the world, gather more experience and know your heart.
Cody is right. Take their advice but make your decision.
You will know what's best in time to come.