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melon1008
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QUOTE:

Originally posted by sherry52033 at 2008-12-30 16:17

Melon, thanks for your support all the time!

I hope i can forget the ring as time goes by. But, it is very hard, you know. Ring comes out everywhere at any time. I feel sad when some friends ...

hehe, maybe you haven't got the whole meaning of mine.
I mean you'd better ask for the ring, and if you think after you ask for the ring, there will a gap between you and your husband, then you'd better forget the ring. But I really think you can't forget the ring issue because everyone gets married got a ring. So you'd better tell your feelings to your husband. If you don't tell him your real feeling, there will be a gap between you and your husband then. Because the ring do plays an important role in our life, especially for people like you who have got married.

So be brave and talk your feelings to your husband.

2008-12-30 04:34 PM

#21

magneone
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Okay Okay

QUOTE:

Originally posted by melon1008 at 2008-12-30 15:00

Hint is not enough. Maybe you should talk directly with him. You can tell him you don't care about the actual valve of the ring, but you do care about the meaning and the symbolized meaning of ri ...

Alright, I am beginning to see a pattern. Worrying about your problem isn't going to solve it. Write a letter to your husband and leave it on his desk or just get a family member to give it to him. This method works best because it is indirect.

What you decide to write in your letter will be up to you. But you will need to tell him that this ring is of significant and sentimental value. Something like "I can only wish this of you."

Obviously you shouldn't force a man to buy things. It goes a little beyond the fine line between a man and a woman. You have to nudge him to work in your favor. It is the best way.

Best wishes with it. Hope to see a happy new year.

P.S. No need to thank. Kind regards,
Jerry

2008-12-30 04:59 PM

#22

comeisgone
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my suggestion: go shopping with your husband, and looking those rings. and let him try some rings and see which one is right for him and buy it, telling him: we are married and i want you have a ring on your finger, la...la, something like this.

then see what's going to happen.

2008-12-30 05:16 PM

#23

littleboat
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Sherry, I believe you already know the truth, but you just don't want to admit it, because the truth is cruel.

Now the good thing is, you at least have a normal life in other people's eyes and your children have a legitimate father; while the bad thing is, you probably cannot rely on him for anything, both financially and emotionally.

So now, if you still want to stay in the marriage, you have to be strong both for yourself and your children; however, if in the future you have some better choice (you meet some better men), you may just leave your nominal husband without even looking back.

Actually there are a lot of men like this. If you go to Tianya, you will find a lot of women in similar situations. If you post your question there, the forumites there, especially female forumites, might give you some useful tips.

2008-12-30 08:04 PM

#24

littleboat
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test

test

2008-12-30 08:05 PM

#25

littleboat
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Shelly, you know the truth. You just don't want to admit it, because the truth is cruel.

2008-12-30 08:40 PM

#26

pjtran (陳青龍 aka 真多花色)
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ring is the key to chastity...

QUOTE:

Originally posted by sherry52033 at 12/29/08 12:29 AM
Each girl dreams to be the most beautiful bride that day. Dreams the moment groom wears the ring for her personally. But nothing happened in my wedding. My husband d ...

i have many many rings but i wont bother to wear 'em on any of my fingers...i'm not sure which kind you have in mind

a ring on a 4th finger of the left hand of yours signals i should LEAVE you alone 'cause you're taken by someone else already...and if you dont have a ring on that finger of yours i SHOULD attack you at no time in life

*if you relay this message to your husband then i'm sure he'll do somethin 'bout it really quick (as soon as he hears my name, Peter) ;P ;P

BTW...i wish you both stay 2gether 4ever...'til eternity

*a ring is a tacit bond of permanent relationship...but people still divorcing like crazy & like ME

;P :lol

2008-12-30 09:34 PM

#27

cathyhui
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ask him why he didn't buy you a ring

2008-12-31 09:01 AM

#28

someonebb
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I am single and have no plan about marriage, but I do know that on my Wedding I should and must buy my
wife a ring. I think we all know what it means to a girl. You really mind your empty finger, so talk to him. Maybe he is just too careless. Do make the communication too harsh. If he really loves you, it will all turn good! Good luck!!!

2008-12-31 09:26 AM

#29

shuleibest
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just tell him your real feeling

I think every groom will buy a ring for his wife if he loves her.

2008-12-31 09:30 AM

#30

lcy331
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tell him that you are very sad of that you didn't receive a ring from him on the wedding......
or,go to buy a pair of rings right now and ask him to wear ring for you as the compensation of failure

2008-12-31 09:46 AM

#31

sherry52033
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QUOTE:

Originally posted by comeisgone at 2008-12-30 17:16
my suggestion: go shopping with your husband, and looking those rings. and let him try some rings and see which one is right for him and buy it, telling him: we are married and i want you have a ri ...

Once we went shopping, I chose a ring and asked him if it is beautiful. He said it is nice, unfortunately he didn’t show any interest to buy me a ring. Maybe… I am not worthy of a ring in his mind.

2008-12-31 09:56 AM

#32

shirley0099
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i think this question is funny, if i were you, i would ask my husband why, maybe your husband think the ring just a ring.

2008-12-31 10:06 AM

#33

James518
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sherry, having no ring doesn't matter, i'll help you ask your hubby to compensate one to you someday.

2008-12-31 10:11 AM

#34

wgl
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oh,I don't know what to say after read your article ,but it is certain that in my wedding my wife will wear the ring whatever it is expensive and cheap.
plaese happily ,it is ture marriage ring is impotant ,but the real love is mosr importance.

2008-12-31 10:16 AM

#35

anegron
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DO NOT write a letter and leave it to him, or ask a family member to do this. First off its not a good method, he is your husband and you should be upfront with him...thats what marriage is, being open enough with someone that you can tell them anything, on a higher level of just a best friend....writing a letter and leaving it around is a stupid ass idea

Also, maybe he just can't afford it, maybe he can...if hes making comments about it my guess is hes saving up for one right now but that can't always be true either. Just bring it up to him in a polite manner. Just say "why didn't you get me a ring" but do it in a nice manner by starting off with "hunny can i talk to you about something that's been on my mind" and just be up front, hes your husband!

-D

2008-12-31 10:18 AM

#36

allenmiao
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QUOTE:

Originally posted by sherry52033 at 2008-12-29 13:40
Do you have a ring when you get married?

yes, i bought one ring for my wife when marriage, although it's not expensive, but that's what i can afford for her right now,
also i think several year later, i can afford more beautiful and expensive ring for her...

2008-12-31 10:22 AM

#37

comeisgone
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QUOTE:

Originally posted by sherry52033 at 2008-12-31 09:56

Once we went shopping, I chose a ring and asked him if it is beautiful. He said it is nice, unfortunately he didn’t show any interest to buy me a ring. Maybe… I am not worthy of a ring in his ...

i mean buy him a ring,

and during the time, tell him what's your feeling about the marriage ring. buy him one, and let him know it is very importand in your eyes.

then see what's going to happen.

if he still have no idea to buy one for you, ask him directly why (not in the shop, after home, have a talk with him).

2008-12-31 10:30 AM

#38

allenmiao
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QUOTE:

per man's instinct, i really don't want to say your husband don't love u a little...but actually i have to say that, don't u think so?
u said u were prenant unexpectedly then he married u also the wedding ring didn't come out...
also u siad u don't feel happy after marriage, right?
that shows u don't satisfied with your marriage, never only consider that your hunband didn't buy u wedding ring,
without wedding ring is just an excuse or signal, i think.
also i think u must never communicate with your hunband freely, do you both often talk about your life, feeling, your marriage, your future? i bet the answer should be NO, right?

my viewpoint is your problem is not without wedding ring, that's the unsatisfied marriage u have with your hunband, right?

so the reasonable action for u is you should talk with husband about your feeling, marriage.
it's unnecessary to say out u wanna get the wedding ring,
because even your hunband would buy u that, are u sure u would be happy? would satisfied with your marrage?

frankly speaking, i am very sorry to hear your this story and feel sympathism on u.
my suggestion is u really should think over your hunband, marriage, feeling, kids, future before u decide to talk with your hunband.

hope u can get your satisfied direction soon.
good luck!

2008-12-31 10:59 AM

#39

allenmiao
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per man's instinct, i really don't want to say your husband don't love u a little...but actually i have to say that, don't u think so?
u said u were prenant unexpectedly then he married u also the wedding ring didn't come out...
also u siad u don't feel happy after marriage, right?
that shows u don't satisfied with your marriage, never only consider that your hunband didn't buy u wedding ring,
without wedding ring is just an excuse or signal, i think.
also i think u must never communicate with your hunband freely, do you both often talk about your life, feeling, your marriage, your future? i bet the answer should be NO, right?

my viewpoint is your problem is not without wedding ring, that's the unsatisfied marriage u have with your hunband, right?

so the reasonable action for u is you should talk with husband about your feeling, marriage.
it's unnecessary to say out u wanna get the wedding ring,
because even your hunband would buy u that, are u sure u would be happy? would satisfied with your marrage?
by then u would know the ring is not the answer u expect your husband should do for u.

frankly speaking, i am very sorry to hear your this story and feel sympathism on u.
my suggestion is u really should think over your hunband, marriage, feeling, kids, future before u decide to talk with your hunband.

hope u can get your satisfied direction soon.
good luck!

2008-12-31 11:03 AM

#40

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