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Letting Go Of A Toxic Relationship [Copy link] 中文

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Post time 2017-10-2 12:43:27 |Display all floors
Letting Go Of A Toxic Relationship

Letting go of any relationship is difficult. Letting go of a toxic relationship is even more difficult. One never expects to get into a toxic relationship, and when you realize that you’re in a toxic relationship, it usually catches you by surprise.
The problem is, while we recognize a relationship as toxic, it is still quite difficult to convince ourselves to let go. One of the first things you need to remind yourself when you let go of a toxic relationship is that you are not weak for wanting to let go of the relationship. The signs of a toxic relationship can vary at times.

Sometimes they’re clear cut: you might be experiencing emotional and physical abuse, lying, and cheating. However, there may be times when you might not be sure if you are in a toxic relationship, but you do find yourself feeling something off about your whole relationship. This might be characterized by feeling lonely, despite being in a relationship, a feeling of not wanting to see your partner, or the feeling of a lack of intimacy between the both of you.

It is difficult to leave a relationship, even a toxic one, because of the fear that one might end up alone and unloved. However, once you have come to terms with the fact that you are in a toxic relationship, and have made the decision to leave, this gives you the strength to change your life with your own two hands for the better.

Sometimes being selfish is exactly what you need out of your life, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. You cannot keep living with the mentality that if you love your partner enough, they will be willing to change for you. If they were really willing to change themselves, they would have done so a long time ago.

If the relationship makes you feel bad, then it might be a bad relationship. Fight for your relationship if it’s still worth it, but if you find there’s no point, then allow yourself to let go. Sometimes our lives are not better by the people we keep in our lives, but by those we choose to let go to improve our lives.

Have you ever been in a toxic relationship? What advice can you give about getting over it? Send me a message, or leave a comment below, and we’ll talk about it!


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Post time 2017-10-2 13:04:24 |Display all floors


I realized I was married to a toxic person and went to the extreme of divorcing her. That only made her more toxic. But it was worth doing it. It was a necessity if I wanted to reclaim some normalcy in my life. After the divorce, she turned criminal and the authorities parked her in jail for a while. After her release, she came back to extort money from me, to burgle my home and to threaten me and others. I moved house and she lost me for good.

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Post time 2017-10-4 16:50:47 |Display all floors
seneca Post time: 2017-10-2 13:04
I realized I was married to a toxic person and went to the extreme of divorcing her. That only mad ...

She must have put on a good act when you were dating her....
why marry her?
if you want something in life get off your backside, and do it yourself!! don't rely on others to do it for you

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Post time 2017-10-4 17:52:00 |Display all floors
parcher Post time: 2017-10-4 16:50
She must have put on a good act when you were dating her....
why marry her?



To be frank, I was terribly naive more than once in my life, but in her case, yes, she pulled the wool over my eyes big time.

I met her in downtown Shenzhen and initially it was just a nice and rosy friendship - casual and a little romantic. Then a U.S. American former workmate introduced a woman to me, which I did not want to have done. He felt a little guilty towards me because he had once answered a telephone call for me from another Chinese woman with whom I had a purely Platonic relationship. It so happened she was keen on marrying a U.S. American, and the U.S. American fell head over feet for her although he was twice her age (58 versus 29!) and married. He thought he had taken that woman from me but this really was not the case.

When he brought her to my new apartment, my new local flame was very openly jealous. In my naivety I took this as a sign of loyalty. However, at that time I did not even know she was still married to a Shenzhen man. By sheer coincidence, he too was about twice her age, so I looked like the promised apple from Garden Eden... One day she came to me with a green booklet. It was a Chinese divorce document. The woman had divorced her Shenzhen husband in order to get hitched to me... And she succeeded in that, which is testament to more naivety on my part... And why was I so naive? Because she was a woman from deep in the countryside who had to marry an old codger to be allowed to move to Shenzhen. In those days, only the rich and highly educated could migrate to Shenzhen.

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Post time 2017-10-4 23:15:25 |Display all floors
10 years, four psychiatrist, the final doctor told me to bail out. It was worth every penny.

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Post time 2017-10-5 21:06:18 |Display all floors
seneca Post time: 2017-10-4 17:52
To be frank, I was terribly naive more than once in my life, but in her case, yes, she pulled th ...

Woman from deep in the countryside
yes I was told to avoid them by my 1st boss who is australion 10 yrs ago,,
my 2nd boss then told me to find a woman with an education..lol
if you want something in life get off your backside, and do it yourself!! don't rely on others to do it for you

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Post time 2017-10-6 10:01:17 |Display all floors
parcher Post time: 2017-10-5 21:06
Woman from deep in the countryside
yes I was told to avoid them by my 1st boss who is australi ...



I still feel the more honest people come from rural parts. Nowhere else corrupts people so quickly as cities. A rural dweller quickly finds that in the city anything goes while back in the village you behave yourself honorably. Education? What is "education" to a Chinese? It is a tool, a means by which to further his or her personal interests.

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